Magic Button

[morningdew]

Most days I ask myself "If I could just push a button right now and be gone, would I do it"
The answer has been yes 99% of the time for the past 4 years.

Ending it seems so logical. I would push it right now. Yet, I can't get myself to go though with any method. I just want to not suffer every single day.

 

[gothfairy]

i feel this so much, you're not alone. i wish it wasnt so hard to die tbh

 

[Kodama]

I have a power button tattooed on my neck... unfortunately it doesn' Work

 

[Nem]

I think it's tough to end things sometimes when the reason is/was out of our control to bring us to this predicament. Either way this is a shit hole of a planet and it's going down daily, I would love it if a third world country started nuking things left and right.
Peace/hugs DEATH!!!

 

[morningdew]

I think it's tough to end things sometimes when the reason is/was out of our control to bring us to this predicament. Either way this is a shit hole of a planet and it's going down daily, I would love it if a third world country started nuking things left and right.
Peace/hugs DEATH!!!

If there was advanced warning I'd do everything I could to be in the impact zone!

 

[Dystopia]

 

[Hel]

I've been thinking about that button for the past two years. I wish it existed

 

[MeltingHeart]

Most days I ask myself "If I could just push a button right now and be gone, would I do it"
The answer has been yes 99% of the time for the past 4 years.

Ending it seems so logical. I would push it right now. Yet, I can't get myself to go though with any method. I just want to not suffer every single day.

100% same

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

Yet, I can't get myself to go though with any method. I just want to not suffer every single day.

I'm right there with you. If there were a center--a dying center--where I could go and give myself over to the care of others (like going in for surgery), I'd do it in a heartbeat. Could you imagine needing major surgery and having to arrange all the prep and source and buy the drugs... yourself? I bet there'd be far fewer surgeries. But that's what we have to do in realizing the biggest decision of our existence. It can be terrifying and immobilizing.

Best of luck to you.

 

[MeltingHeart]

I think it's tough to end things sometimes when the reason is/was out of our control to bring us to this predicament. Either way this is a shit hole of a planet and it's going down daily, I would love it if a third world country started nuking things left and right.
Peace/hugs DEATH!!!

It's true what you say about having to end it when those reasons where out of control- I dream of/ fantasise the life I could lived or who I could have been where it not for those external factors- I can't stop thinking about them when I think of ctb - like why did it come to this? And yet those thoughts at this late stage are version on delusional as they are impossible to realise now- but yet they exist imbedded in my mind that I could have had a good life where it not for those things. It's such a horrible feeling to carry around.

 

[LMLN]

I'm right there with you. If there were a center--a dying center--where I could go and give myself over to the care of others (like going in for surgery), I'd do it in a heartbeat. Could you imagine needing major surgery and having to arrange all the prep and source and buy the drugs... yourself? I bet there'd be far fewer surgeries. But that's what we have to do in realizing the biggest decision of our existence. It can be terrifying and immobilizing.

Best of luck to you.

When you say that I remember what it was like when I had anesthesia/surgery. Just to count down and be out and not wake up. How nice would that be! The waking up part was the worst!

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

Just to count down and be out and not wake up. How nice would that be! The waking up part was the worst!

Yes x 1000.

 

[SuicidalSymphonies]

PRESS PRESS PRESS PRESS PRESS.

 

[Corraled]

I'm right there with you. If there were a center--a dying center--where I could go and give myself over to the care of others (like going in for surgery), I'd do it in a heartbeat. Could you imagine needing major surgery and having to arrange all the prep and source and buy the drugs... yourself? I bet there'd be far fewer surgeries. But that's what we have to do in realizing the biggest decision of our existence. It can be terrifying and immobilizing.

Best of luck to you.

Surgery and you have to get all the supplies yourself? It happens sometimes, during times of man-made shortages.

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

Surgery and you have to get all the supplies yourself? It happens sometimes, during times of man-made shortages.

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