Lying to my therapist

[justkenisfine]

I've been lying to my therapist a lot lately. Mostly because when I told her that I was feeling suicidal she asked for my address and I immediately regretted giving it to her. I don't think I would commit suicide any time soon. At the soonest would be summer, after I've visited my best friend. But my suicidal thoughts feel way more intrusive than planning or something I really want. Which is why being on ss helps. My therapist says that confronting my intrusive thoughts head on gives them less power and being able to talk about suicide with people who won't judge me is a huge part of the confrontation. But lately she keeps asking if something in my life is new or different that might be contributing to my downswing and I know that if I say I've been on here then that's going to be seen as more evidence that I'm planning when I'm not.
I don't know. Lying to my therapist feels really immoral and makes me guilty but there's not really another option unless I want her to send an ambulance over.

Anyone else have experiences like this?

 

[cogmachine]

i lied only to stop going to it. depending on where you live, there will be exceptions for that confidentiality / silence, but i sincerely doubt you will get admitted if you said that you have those sort of intrusive thoughts, as the chance of you (or anyone for that matter) acting on them is minimal. did you say anything else that could make her suspicious of you being a danger to yourself / others?

 

[Fireprayer]

I lied to my therapist today about not having a plan to CTB and said that I only had fleeting thoughts of suicidal ideation. I'm too embarrassed to bring it up, as well as not wanting to be put on hold again. In order to be committed (in my state) you have to have an active plan that puts you or others in danger, not just fleeting thoughts, suicidal ideation, or intrusive thoughts.

 

[mrkillmyself]

I'll start to lie too so i can get HRT faster, so i can see that. I don't really feel bad for doing that tho.

 

[CantWait2D1E]

Yes I've had to lie to therapists and psychiatrists too.
Doesn't seem like it's too beneficial if you can't truly express how you feel. Maybe talk to us instead or your best friend if you trust them?

 

[BroodingBleu]

Tomorrow I have my follow up with my doctor who referred me to a psych clinic that i couldn't bring myself to go to, odds are high my life is gonna come crashing down tomorrow unless i straight up lie, but eh. We shall see.

I know exactly where you're coming from, I had the same exact issue with my doctor and therapist last time I had my visits.

 

[theboy]

why did you lie to him?