![Meena](/data/avatars/l/0/729.jpg?1551555797)
Meena
Student
- Jun 7, 2018
- 138
I have experienced the meaningless of life.
I know we r all in the same boat wanting to end our lives.
Idk if anyone else has experienced like me the nonsense of life.
I have bipolar disorder. And in addition to that have suffered from erotomania and illusions that my psychiatrist is in love with me. This has ruined my marriage.
My ex hwo is from another country chose to come back to his country and take our son from whom i am seperated for the last 6 years. I got to see him few times per year.
But the worse for me is the reaction of my son. I have been told that maternity is the greatest feeling in this world. To have this deep connection between a child and a mother. The point is that my son is doing very well without me and i feel i am not essential to his life while he means the world for me. Although i have experienced war, poverty, mental illness in my life, this point: knowing that i am superfluous to my kid is the worse feeling ever. We became stranger to each other.
I tried to find comfort in religion but didn't get any.
If i will ctb, i think it won't be because of my pbs. I believe that maybe we all might have a solution to ours pbs one day.
I want to die because life is meaningless.
Love, maternity, religion, family.. they mean nothing to me anymore.
Thank you for reading me
I know we r all in the same boat wanting to end our lives.
Idk if anyone else has experienced like me the nonsense of life.
I have bipolar disorder. And in addition to that have suffered from erotomania and illusions that my psychiatrist is in love with me. This has ruined my marriage.
My ex hwo is from another country chose to come back to his country and take our son from whom i am seperated for the last 6 years. I got to see him few times per year.
But the worse for me is the reaction of my son. I have been told that maternity is the greatest feeling in this world. To have this deep connection between a child and a mother. The point is that my son is doing very well without me and i feel i am not essential to his life while he means the world for me. Although i have experienced war, poverty, mental illness in my life, this point: knowing that i am superfluous to my kid is the worse feeling ever. We became stranger to each other.
I tried to find comfort in religion but didn't get any.
If i will ctb, i think it won't be because of my pbs. I believe that maybe we all might have a solution to ours pbs one day.
I want to die because life is meaningless.
Love, maternity, religion, family.. they mean nothing to me anymore.
Thank you for reading me