Love and Sex Addiction Leading to Suicide

[Edward1]

I thought this might be an interesting thread for discussion as I came across a thread on exes causing suicidal thoughts. I am a sex addict and love addict (two different addictions) both truly horrific to suffer from. Essentially similar to other addictions such as gambling, alcohol, and drug etc. Sex and Love addictions can suffice in many forms, and very little is known or talked about it. Essentially sex addiction is a taboo subject that in kept in a dusty dark corner, with sufferers feeling doubly humiliated about suffering from it. What's more, because it isn't discussed enough, people sufferering from the addiction don't even know they have it. If you want to know more just look up the addictions and there should be more information available. I have been on and off to local help groups, one related to sex addiction and one concerning sex and love addiction. I'll reveal more if the thread develops, and if group users wish to know more.
Thanks to @KiraComplex for her 'CTB over ex' thread

 

[woxihuanni]

I am not an addict to either. However, calling the need to have a mate an addiction is like saying the need to have food is an addiction. Of course, one needs to be able to go without a partner for a while and not depend on them for self-worth or survival skills, which is precisely what I did for most of life because no potential mate was suitable enough.

You know what? It was the most idiotic thing I ever did. I'd have learnt how to manage a partner when at last I found the suitable one. My career is not something I can fuck now.

While most of the world is aware that mating is a need, and even breed like vermin when they cannot feed their own selves, the enlightened bunch will die out by creating helplines for people who want to fuck in a bond.

 

[cryptic_cynic]

I am not an addict to either. However, calling the need to have a mate an addiction is like saying the need to have food is an addiction.

You clearly don't know anything about the topic at hand, and really should have kept your mouth shut.

There is an incredible difference between needing/wanting food and food addiction. Same with sex and love. If you didn't know that, you would do well to practice some humility in keeping your mouth shut about it, rather than waste space with your ignorance.

 

[Edward1]

Addiction is the most horrific mental affliction anyone could ever imagine. It tests the strength of the soul to the maximum. Some people make it through. Some stagger along. Many prefer death to the daily fight.

 

[Dantec]

So, you, @crytic_cynic have chosen this theme ? even if, contrary to the interventions it evokes, your name does not appear in relation to its formulation, the right of expression poses in fact two conditions, one on the 'other. by the ability of the intelligence to know, that is to say to allow the reception and the emission of something real according to you...

Let me be stupid then, like @woxyhuanni, without being arrogant as you.

 

[Temporarilyabsurd]

Welcome to the board @Edward1 .

Addiction is a thing here .

It's a drag when a natural thing get's messed up .

Intimacy / Love / Sexy time ... always been a problem for me ... but I used to just drink it away .
( Did 10 years with an enabler ... )
Luckily aging seems to take the edge off the libido for me ...
Now I just want to be accepted I think .

So , welcome again !
Cheers .

 

[Dawn0071111]

You clearly don't know anything about the topic at hand, and really should have kept your mouth shut.

There is an incredible difference between needing/wanting food and food addiction. Same with sex and love. If you didn't know that, you would do well to practice some humility in keeping your mouth shut about it, rather than waste space with your ignorance.

I dunno... I think his comment has some merit.. Psycology is a reletivly new science and while it may be true that some humans become dysfunctional in thier quest to mate & bond... some of us may feel this need stronger than others and get into toxic situations, but sometimes the terms "love addict/sex addict" may not fit..... I mean how would a person know if they are a love addict or just unlucky in love, or have poor social skills, or ????? Maybe sometimes there is a thin line.... because we are social creatues.... but then again.... is a partner nesecarry for joy & happiness? If the answer is yes, does that qualify? While anyone can see the difference between need and pathology, I do think there is a place to look at the concept of addiction to see if it can really be properly applied to "love."

 

[Edward1]

I dunno... I think his comment has some merit.. Psycology is a reletivly new science and while it may be true that some humans become dysfunctional in thier quest to mate & bond... some of us may feel this need stronger than others and get into toxic situations, but sometimes the terms "love addict/sex addict" may not fit..... I mean how would a person know if they are a love addict or just unlucky in love, or have poor social skills, or ????? Maybe sometimes there is a thin line.... because we are social creatues.... but then again.... is a partner nesecarry for joy & happiness? If the answer is yes, does that qualify? While anyone can see the difference between need and pathology, I do think there is a place to look at the concept of addiction to see if it can really be properly applied to "love."

Thank you Dawn. You might be able to find answers to the questions you pose, although it could be a painful journey to find them. https://slaafws.org/

 

[Edward1]

I was in recovery once and very almost got there. It felt wonderful. Oops. I think back to it now and wish I'd held on. For my kids of nothing else. Since then I've right royally fucked things up.

 

[GreyMonkey]

I identify as a love addict.

Essentially as far as I understand it addiction largely stems to cover up a void of emptiness/shame/loneliness/low self esteem and largely results from early attachment wounds.

Theory, however, doesn't deal with how horrific and devastating the experience is.

I have been in a handful of relationships in my life and in each one a point happened where I became entirely out of control, dramatic, constantly needing higher and higher levels of love and reassurance beyond the capacity of my partner to give as I regressed to increasingly juvenile states. And then when the relationship inevitably ends I become a wreck that lasts for an inappropriate length of time.

This time it ended with me developing a chronic anxiety condition, immensely impaired confidence and self worth and resulting in barely functional.

I yearn for death to end it as I cannot imagine the rest of my life living in this internal prison. Desperately longing for a mate yet unable to functionally be with someone.

I'm too scared to ctb though. All the methods terrify me and I oscillate in a constant limbo. It's hell. I want out. Please.

 

[Final Escape]

I identify as a love addict.

Essentially as far as I understand it addiction largely stems to cover up a void of emptiness/shame/loneliness/low self esteem and largely results from early attachment wounds.

Theory, however, doesn't deal with how horrific and devastating the experience is.

I have been in a handful of relationships in my life and in each one a point happened where I became entirely out of control, dramatic, constantly needing higher and higher levels of love and reassurance beyond the capacity of my partner to give as I regressed to increasingly juvenile states. And then when the relationship inevitably ends I become a wreck that lasts for an inappropriate length of time.

This time it ended with me developing a chronic anxiety condition, immensely impaired confidence and self worth and resulting in barely functional.

I yearn for death to end it as I cannot imagine the rest of my life living in this internal prison. Desperately longing for a mate yet unable to functionally be with someone.

I'm too scared to ctb though. All the methods terrify me and I oscillate in a constant limbo. It's hell. I want out. Please.

Sounds like what happened in my relationships.

 

[Edward1]

Bump