Looked at Your preteen pics lately?

[Death_is_Escape]

If so, then how'd You feel about them? Did You say to Yourself, " That kid deserved a much better life." ?

 

[fettuccinee]

All the time..

 

[ThisIsTheLastNight]

If you look unhappy on pictures from the childhood then that clearly shows that something went very wrong. The worst thing is the parents of such children are very ignorant and do not realize how unhappy their child is. That the child is not looking forward to birthdays, looks ill, maybe overweight. These are all signs that the child is suffering. Whether such children deserve better is difficult to answer. I know some of these children and they did other really bad things as adults. They were no better than other kids with a good childhood although you might expect them to be more empathic because they themselves suffered alot.

 

[Elias]

God damnit, I literally did that this morning. There's this pic of me in the living room, next to my brother and everytime I looke at it I'm like "Sorry I failed you buddy". Ugh.

 

[GrizzlyGrapefruit]

I looked at a picture of me from my sophomore year of high school a week or so ago, so not quite me as a preteen but close enough I suppose. And yes, I have the same exact feelings as you.

Even though it was only 5 years ago, I cannot believe how much of a 180 my life made in that span of time. It sends me into a panic when I do that, so I actually try to make an effort not to look at pictures of times before my life turned. Although I sometimes can't help myself but to reminisce about how times used to be .

 

[marcusuk63]

yes and thought two down one to go 1965 my twin. older brother, mum and I , twin died years ago and older brother a few months ago and mum has just been in hospital to have a kidney out due to cancer but she`s doing fine and dad is looking after her. in their 80`s but more like 60 year olds !!

 

[gingerplum]

yes and thought two down one to go 1965 my twin. older brother, mum and I , twin died years ago and older brother a few months ago and mum has just been in hospital to have a kidney out due to cancer but she`s doing fine and dad is looking after her. in their 80`s but more like 60 year olds !!

So sorry to hear you lost two brothers, especially your twin; that must have been devastating.

 

[Wayfaerer]

If so, then how'd You feel about them? Did You say to Yourself, " That kid deserved a much better life." ?

Yes, just a few weeks ago. I had very similar thoughts.

 

[Élégie]

If so, then how'd You feel about them? Did You say to Yourself, " That kid deserved a much better life." ?

I feel so sad when I look at old pictures. I wish things could have been different... I deserved a much better life.
It's too late now anyways...

 

[Sweet emotion]

I can't stand to look at old pictures of myself because it shows a beautiful girl who was strong, happy, and healthy. My body has visciously turned against me and when I look at those old pics all I want to do is die. That girl in the pictures doesn't exist anymore.

 

[Sammybackflip]

Sometimes I beat off to my preteen pics

 

[woxihuanni]

Don't have any pictures. Just that life is not about deserving, but about starts aligning, sort of.

That kid deserved good things, but was also so annoyingly 'good' that it's no wonder life does not like them much. Almost like an alien when they don't cry and scream, but smile and move on. You're not fucking Jesus, kid, wish you had a little bit of destructive power in you.

 

[ImmaMacGuffin]

I, as well, have no pictures. 3 times in my life I have destroyed or given away everything I had accumulated to each successive point. If I did have a preteen picture of myself, I would tell her that she deserved to be loved...but she'd never believe that.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

I look at them all the time I yearn for my perfect childhood and I feel so bad for how that happy child in the picture who lived in a paradise of imaginary wonders had to become what I am today, I am so sorry child me

 

[tomz323]

God damnit, I literally did that this morning. There's this pic of me in the living room, next to my brother and everytime I looke at it I'm like "Sorry I failed you buddy". Ugh.

Ha, me too. Ended up sitting down and staring at my old photos for an hour when I couldn't sleep

If you look unhappy on pictures from the childhood then that clearly shows that something went very wrong. The worst thing is the parents of such children are very ignorant and do not realize how unhappy their child is. That the child is not looking forward to birthdays, looks ill, maybe overweight. These are all signs that the child is suffering. Whether such children deserve better is difficult to answer. I know some of these children and they did other really bad things as adults. They were no better than other kids with a good childhood although you might expect them to be more empathic because they themselves suffered alot.

That's something weird I noticed, how I don't look as happy as my brother does.

 

[Rachel74]

I did last year as I found lots of me and my brother who I had just lost to cancer. Bless him

 

[Death_is_Escape]

All the time..

I attempt to avoid any pictures of Myself within that range of age: It is too emotionally painful.

 

[TheDevilsAngel]

Yes and it always makes me upset and i feel sorry for the girl in them pictures.....

 

[Death_is_Escape]

Ha, me too. Ended up sitting down and staring at my old photos for an hour when I couldn't sleep


That's something weird I noticed, how I don't look as happy as my brother does.

Perhaps in certain countries where children are basically Slaves, such issues don't register with enough adults.

I feel so sad when I look at old pictures. I wish things could have been different... I deserved a much better life.
It's too late now anyways...

Most of My most painful memories are from My childhood.

Yes and it always makes me upset and i feel sorry for the girl in them pictures.....

Don't you wish You could raise the Childhood You?
My condolence.

I did last year as I found lots of me and my brother who I had just lost to cancer. Bless him ❤

 

[eve2004]

I didn't feel like I had an unhappy upbringing although emotionally my parents weren't exactly expressive. I didn't know any other way, so I believed it was normal. I did enjoy a lot of things like going to school to see my friends, trading stickers in grade 6 (I I know, I know... I'm old) etc. School life was my awesome escape and home life was at best neutral or overwhelmingly unbearable. I'd consider my childhood and early teen years to be some of the best in my life (despite missing out on a lot of normal things like movies and friends), and playing 3 sports and 3 music instruments distracted me sufficently and ironically became my coping mechanism to this day (ie around 20 years post-teen).

Bottom line: when I look at pre-teen or early teen and even childhood photos (that's what their called when it's not digital, right? LOL), it does bring back good memories of the sheltered but active life I led. As soon as I turned 17-18, things changed and my parent's total control over me was threatened by my being « rebellious » (AKA: a normal teenager) so I left home and was lucky from then on that I've always landed softly on my feet due to helpful and supportive friends.

I continued to land softly on every leap of faith I took in my life and career until recent years.

NOW if I look at any recent pictures of myself (mostly not taken by me and some not even consented to), I cringe and wish I'd had the means to CTB earlier (few years ago). Better late than never LOL...

 

[ReturnToNothing]

I think the seeds of my unwellness had already started growing at that point.... wish I could go back and talk to that person. Don't even know how I could say anything to be effective

 

[pole]

yep and im still ugly as shit

 

[LastFlowers]

I look at them and think-
"How the fuck was it possible that I got even uglier?"

 

[Darkhaven]

Yep, and it breaks my "heart". (Wait! Do i even have a heart??)
I realise what a naive and innocent kid i was back then.
I didn't have a single notion of what was going to fall down on me.
I was a kid full of dreams and ambitions. I was a dreamer. All of that was taken away by freaking disease. It destroyed all of my hopes of having a better life.
That and my broken and sick mind.
I also wish that my mother hadn't made some mistakes and get involved with people i would rather have not known. But you know how it is: you live with them, you depend on them and you don't have a saying on what they do with their lives.
I definately feel for my younger self. Should i have had better parents and i would be a happier kid.
Might even have a better mental health and, at least, some social life.

 

[FighterOfTheNightman]

Last time I looked at mine I got into a rage because my dad left me and my mom around the time I was like 14, and I got rapidly overweight and I could sense the bad coming before he even left.. I started getting fat from like 13 on.

I lost a lot of weight since then.. but you can see my cortisol levels spiked out during my most formative times.. and I was miserable and angry and confused.. and alone..
I looked through some photo albums a few years ago and got myself drunk/tripping and went down to my dad's house and destroyed his yard and messed up his cars and property...

 

[Astral316]

Two different kids in my old photos... a thin, outgoing child and a very chubby tweener with an inferiority complex. The latter kid ruined me for the rest of my life.

 

[TearyEyedQueen]

What scares me is the eyes. I happen to have a babyface so my face barely changed at all during the depression times. Except for the eyes. They changed so much I could have barely recognized them on their own. Of course my expression became more mature, but that's not all. Even in kid photos when I'm semi serious, there was still that shine in the eyes which os gone now. Now you can see it in my eyes that something just died inside and is permanently broken.
Eyes are said to be the window to the soul, after all.

 

[_Minsk]

What scares me is the eyes. I happen to have a babyface so my face barely changed at all during the depression times. Except for the eyes. They changed so much I could have barely recognized them on their own. Of course my expression became more mature, but that's not all. Even in kid photos when I'm semi serious, there was still that shine in the eyes which os gone now. Now you can see it in my eyes that something just died inside and is permanently broken.
Eyes are said to be the window to the soul, after all.

same:/

 

[Manja]

I don't have many pics but I look different in every one...like I have multiple personality dissorder

 

[Mr2005]

It's another life