People who say that to you are sadists, I am sure.
My initial response to this comment was honestly laughter, then the utter truth of it, for so many people hit hard, and it's just sad.
My mother passed away earlier this year. We had known that it was coming for a long time, but every time I brought up end-of-life and DNR questions, she'd refuse to even discuss it, because she wanted yo live forever.
She ended up having to be rushed to the ER, and once stabilized, she was taken to a nursing facility, where we were assigned a social worker. The social worker reached out to me and asked what our mom's wishes were, and when I explained the situation, she said that she'd handle it (like she had for many other families). The next day she called and said that my mom had signed a DNR.
When I asked how the social worker had gotten through to my mother, she told me that she simply explained all of the suffering my mother would likely experience with the different answers. With that simple perspective change, the suffering our mom had equated with death, became associated with living, and she simply wanted to avoid any more suffering.
