No, I see no happiness in something as evil and torturous as existence, this existence is an abomination that causes endless amounts of cruelty and suffering, I don't get what's so happy about existing beings punished by being forced into this deeply undesirable, painful existence that there was never a need for at all burdened with this existence of unnecessary suffering with no limit as to how much agony one can feel, existing beings are tortured in agony every second and it's just so horrific to me.
I'll always see existence as the problem, existence is a mistake and simply being conscious is so unbearably torturous to me, I don't see any benefit to suffering in this horrific reality tortured by this existence just to face the extreme agony of old age, it's just so horrifying to me how a human can suffer for so long just to end up way more tortured, to suffer for another year in this existence is so terrible and dreadful, all that existence ever causes is so much pain and suffering all for the sake of it and I find it so torturous to exist, non-existence is all I see as positive, I'll only be at peace once I no longer suffer and I always suffer so unbearably from existing in this horrific anti-suicide world where wanting peace from all this is a crime.