Leaving soon - bus is around the corner

[RileyTanaka]

I was on borrowed time for the last few years. Things came to a head and now I'm having to CTB in order to avoid homelessness and ongoing abandonment by family who seem to sincerely hate me. I'm also pretty ill and have been debilitated for some time.

I'm probably going to get a lot of hate for this but if you're thinking you want to die because you're ugly, jobless, lonesome - do yourself a favor and really sort through all your options before you throw in the towel. For some problems, time can fix things; for others, resources and outside intervention are needed. It's hard to know which from which in the thick of it. At least then you can say you really did give life one more shot before you snapped. I know I did.

 

[Jean Améry]

I'm probably going to get a lot of hate for this but if you're thinking you want to die because you're ugly, jobless, lonesome - do yourself a favor and really sort through all your options before you throw in the towel.

I don't see why negative emotions let alone 'hate' should be an appropriate respons to what you wrote. Everyone's entitled to their opinion, no-one's entitled to insult or demean others merely for thinking a certain way.

I think it's entirely appropriate to share one's insights and wisdom with others before leaving life. Thank you for expressing yours.

It's your decision and you seem to have thought this through. Go in peace.

I would add that while I fully understand why someone would rather die than become homeless (that expression really does not do justice to the hardship, pain, misery and worry it entails) I think it's absolutely outrageous that any society would allow someone to be reduced to living on the streets. Especially when it's clear it's rich enough to support the boundless lifestyle of its elite.

A select few are billionaires (meaning more wealth than could be spend by many generations of their descendents doing absolutely nothing to make money for themselves) while many millions are extremely poor and destitute. What a f***ed-up world we live in...

Imo in your case and in all cases where people are forced to CTB because of extreme poverty/homelesness society is to blame. If the establishment really wanted to reduce the suicide-rate start by providing everyone with the basic necessities of life. I guarantee far less people will be inclined to end their own lives.

 

[Cashewmilk]

I know what you mean... I felt a little shitty too that people who have good lives and money but want to die because they're ugly or lonely, but then I think about how life itself no matter what is always always going to bring problems. I don't think life is worth living at all, unless you're filthy rich then it might be worth it to stick around just to see what happens in the future with space exploration and the future of humanity... but unfortunately the people who have that kind of money don't actually care about that stuff, seems they want another human something money can't truly buy. At least if you're rich like I'm talking millions and not working just doing fuck all, your own money not your family's, you're a lot better off than most people. Other than that honestly I don't think there's anything to really stick around for. This is a horrible place where horrible things happen every second, right now as I'm typing this, children and babies are getting raped by old rich men, women are being enslaved and tortured, men are being anally raped, people are literally starving to death while others are playing with food, and animals are going through the most horror more than any human has ever known. No one person can fix any of it. It'll never stop its just the way things are. There is no god like police in the air to come stop bad things before they happen.

I'm in the same boat as ypu OP, one death away from homelessness, disabled and abused daily by my family. I'm just happy I no longer have to have sex for money and I finally have some freedom after 9 years of pure hell, I'm taking advantage of this and sleeping whenever I can, waiting for SN to arrive if it will, and collecting methadone.

 

[FriendofDeath]

If I had millions of dollars, I hope I would use it for good, because you have all hit on so many of our societal issues that should NOT be the reason for someone to ctb. I wonder what might happen to me should my living situation have to change (and there's a very real possibility). I live with cats and care for some ferals - they are so important to me. Somehow I ended up with my very own therapy cat. It wouldn't be feasible for me to move in with a relative - we'd drive each other crazy and they really don't understand me! I hope I hit on a solution so I can be prepared. Best to all of you!