Hangm4n

Hangm4n

Consciousness & awareness
Nov 17, 2019
73
I just attempted again. Full suspension. I got the cartoid arteries as well I had no pain everything felt tingly but then I stopped myself last minute the SI kicked in and I didn't even realise it was kicking in!
I feel like I'm gonna need to have more restrictions. I taped my neck up and then put the noose over it. Our willingness not to die is incredible but I really want to go :(
 
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SoupSnakes

SoupSnakes

Experienced
Nov 11, 2019
217
Maybe take a little time away from trying to gather your thoughts and see how you really feel about it? It's amazing how much SI you have when your brain can convince you otherwise. We're all here if you need to talk
 
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Hangm4n

Hangm4n

Consciousness & awareness
Nov 17, 2019
73
I haven't got much time. Once my financial problems come out to my family I'm as good as dead so for me I wanna do it now but I can't get it done. I'm so fed up :(
 
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Jean4

Jean4

Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
Apr 28, 2019
7,557
I haven't got much time. Once my financial problems come out to my family I'm as good as dead so for me I wanna do it now but I can't get it done. I'm so fed up :(
Please feel free not to answer, but I have financial problems also. Unless you stole from them or borrowed money from them and you told them it was for one thing and you used it on something else, why would your family care?
 
Hangm4n

Hangm4n

Consciousness & awareness
Nov 17, 2019
73
Please feel free not to answer, but I have financial problems also. Unless you stole from them or borrowed money from them and you told them it was for one thing and you used it on something else, why would your family care?

No nothing criminal, just credit cards etc but my wife would probably leave, take everything and leave me wanting to die. I just want to go to be honest I'm too exhausted to be alive
 
Jean4

Jean4

Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
Apr 28, 2019
7,557
No nothing criminal, just credit cards etc but my wife would probably leave, take everything and leave me wanting to die. I just want to go to be honest I'm too exhausted to be alive
Again forgive me. I was never married. I am speaking as a female. If I loved someone and was married to them would I be angry if my husband maxed out my cards? Yes. Would I bitch and moan? No. Would I leave my husband no. I would work to fix it.

Similar if my husband got Cancer. Would I leave them? No. What if they became an alcoholic? Wouldn't leave them.

If she loves you, she will be angry but won't leave. If she takes her for better or worse vows seriously, she won't leave you.
 
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Hangm4n

Hangm4n

Consciousness & awareness
Nov 17, 2019
73
You don't know my wife lol. She will leave, she's threatened so much.
 
SoupSnakes

SoupSnakes

Experienced
Nov 11, 2019
217
You don't know my wife lol. She will leave, she's threatened so much.
Maybe she's not the person for you if she's not willing to stick by you through it all
 
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Hangm4n

Hangm4n

Consciousness & awareness
Nov 17, 2019
73
Maybe she's not the person for you if she's not willing to stick by you through it all

I don't think she is. I just want this nightmare to fucking end
 
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lymbo

Arcanist
Oct 12, 2019
483
You don't know my wife lol. She will leave, she's threatened so much.
excuse me but your wyfe sounds lyke a uther bytch !!! what happened to the ;'''together thrue thyck and thyn'''' marryage nowadays ys a complete joke, the smallest hardshyp and people separate, no wll to fyght for the relatyonshyp
 
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Jean4

Jean4

Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
Apr 28, 2019
7,557
You don't know my wife lol. She will leave, she's threatened so much.
No offense. You are the problem, not your wife. You want to stay with a woman who doesn't care about you, and doesn't love you.
Maybe work on your self esteem? Why do you want to be with someone who doesn't care about you.... and you want to CTB because someone who doesn't love you may leave you?
Your choice. I'm not trying to stop you. But sometimes it's better to be alone than with someone who doesn't care. I'm 51 and alone.
 
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lonelywhale

Member
Nov 27, 2019
6
I just attempted again. Full suspension. I got the cartoid arteries as well I had no pain everything felt tingly but then I stopped myself last minute the SI kicked in and I didn't even realise it was kicking in!
I feel like I'm gonna need to have more restrictions. I taped my neck up and then put the noose over it. Our willingness not to die is incredible but I really want to go :(

Yep, as I read somewhere, it's the worst punishment to be given a brain and a mind that wants out and a body that's doing everything to stay. Unfortunately that is the sad reality of the situation.
 
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realjunes

Warlock
Oct 1, 2019
730
Yep, as I read somewhere, it's the worst punishment to be given a brain and a mind that wants out and a body that's doing everything to stay. Unfortunately that is the sad reality of the situation.

Lonelyw - that is a brilliant yet simple way to perfectly express what Hangm4n and so many others feel. TY for contributing that understandable
description of SI.
 
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