Venting Just a little venting

[Jamesun]

I just want to talk for a while.
Lately I've been feeling so awful, I feel like I'm a burden to the people around me, I think I'm slowly rotting away. It seems that everything I do is working out, but I'm not able to finish anything. I feel like there's no future for me other than death, but what a surprise, I'm not even able to end my own life. I don't know why, but no matter how hard I try to change, I just can't. Lately, I'm not even able to go out and do anything When I try to do something I simply can't, I get a horrible anxiety that doesn't go away, I feel so guilty for being like this.
Every day I feel more alone; even though I have friends and family, I believe I am unworthy of them, I feel so much pressure from my family. They keep asking what I'm going to do with my life, telling me to stop being lazy and go out, but I just can't.
Is it all my fault? Am I so useless if only there were an easy way out of this life?
Thank you for your time.

 

[liquid-crystal daze]

Everybody has a different idea of the perfect person that nobody's ever been able to achieve. Best to forget about other people's expectations and be a bit more selfish when it comes to your relationships. People that use words like "lazy" to condemn their "loved ones" tend to take assertive distance more seriously than quiet distance. But even after getting rid of the nagging, the guilt weighs me down. You're not alone in the anxious, sinking feeling. Does it also feel like being stuck in your own head too much? My brain always feels a bit heavy; in a numb way, not a smart one. Don't feel guilty for being like this. Guilt is for things that are your fault, and fault is for things that are wrong. You're not a bad person for being tired.