I have a story you might not want to hear, but here goes.
So I actually tried something similar to this once. I was in a drunken morose state to an extreme degree and found myself heading for a point that I could access the railway line, near to where I used to live. Managed to place myself on the line walking away from the station, with my back to oncoming trains. It was night. It was drizzling with rain, which I knew at this point of the line, (I'm a railways buff) at this time after rush hour and in this weather it was unlikely the driver would see me in time.
But me being intoxicated, I wasn't fully aware of all the factors. As it happened, a member of railway staff must have seen me access the line, probably on CCTV, and made the drivers aware there was a trespasser on the tracks north of the station.
Stumbling along the line in the dark, (which isn't an easy walk) I heard a train approaching from behind, all be it travelling very slow, assuming the driver was on alert. The noise of the grinding wheels got louder and louder behind me. And it was at this point, I lost my footing on the wet ballast between the sleepers, and stumbled to one side, just as the train passed me. To this day I'm about ninety percent sure the train struck me on the knee as it passed, going less than about five miles an hour now, the driver must have seen me and slammed on the breaks. I could gauge the speed because the train came to a complete stop about thirty metres away. Those metro services never really got above sixty miles an hour, but if the driver managed to stop that close he must have been going really slow.
This was the first time. There would be another.
I do regret this episode. Later in life I watched a documentary about what it can do to train drivers who experience hitting a person on the track. It can be really traumatising and most never drive a train again. Now, I don't say this to make you feel guilty. Or to suggest a person is selfish for using this method. After all, this is a risk drivers take when they sign on the dotted line. They're taught during training that these things happen. But for me personally I'm so happy that during this time my plan never came to fruition as I would hate to think I was responsible for trauma in this way. Although you could make the point that I would never have known about it.
Additionally, this does broach the question about the planning of the act, including the thoughts about involving other individuals, whether it's against their will and who is going to discover the scene you leave behind. For me, after my railway episodes, I decided not just to carefully plan the act but to involve as few other people as possible.
But like I say, I have no right to speak for everyone.
And: I might have hurt my knee later on, climbing over a wall.
