I feel you. I'm like "give me a single reason I need to continue" to my mind and come up with nothing every time. It's been this way for a while now. But I still can't do it. A few months ago I had a very strong urge (having just lost my job) but now it's reduced for no reason. I still fantasize about it a lot but just can't get myself to make a move. Maybe it needs a specific, active trigger rather than a passive "whats the point of continuing" feeling? IDK.
Me too. I'm currently sitting here thinking about how in theory I could go to my bedroom right now, hang myself and 15 minutes later I wouldn't have to experience any part of life anymore.. but here I am.. still sitting because I have a huge lack of energy and I think of all the times I put my head in that ligature but I wasn't able to go through with it because of SI and fear..
Me too. I'm currently sitting here thinking about how in theory I could go to my bedroom right now, hang myself and 15 minutes later I wouldn't have to experience any part of life anymore.. but here I am.. still sitting because I have a huge lack of energy and I think of all the times I put my head in that ligature but I wasn't able to go through with it because of SI and fear..
we all understand you. SI is tough. I also have exacerbations and then unfortunately it goes away because of the survival instinct. I hope that when the time comes, SI will not interfere with us much
Of course ctb can be very difficult as the survival instinct is determined to keep us suffering, even know we want to be gone. I believe that there are many people trapped here in horrible lives all because it is so hard to leave this life behind. Existing really is torture and I wish that dying is as easy as peacefully passing away in our sleep.
This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.