Story I've been feeling like shit recently

[DeathPhysiology45]

Hello everyone, as the title says, I've feeling like shit recently, and also for the last two years, I have a girlfriend since past May 29th and that helped me a little bit but I don't feel well enough to continue having a "normal life", she's aware of everything that's happening in my head about suicidal thoughts, I tell her every time I feel like this but I know it's difficult for her to hear that, so I've been thinking to stop telling her, but I don't think that's a good idea because somehow telling her my thoughts and my feelings helps me reduce my anxiety and bad thoughts. I would like to hear your opinions.

 

[BitterlyAlive]

Hmmm. I'll start with my first thought: have you tried asking her about how she thinks and feels about it? Perhaps it's not as much of a burden as you think.

After talking to one of my friends honestly about my suicidal thoughts, she told me it wasn't a problem at all and she would rather have me talk to her about it than keep it inside. But she also feels suicidal and understands, which may be why she doesn't see it as much of a burden. I'm not sure if your girlfriend is able to understand like that or not.

 

[Lmd]

Ask her about how she feels and then look for the best option. Based in my experience, having an emotional support is always good and people are glad to help but you have to be responsible too and try to fix that. Be aware that even if people don't care, you are putting an emotional burden on them.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

I find the issue with telling romantic partners about your suicidal ideation is that they may find themselves responsible for you. It can often be too much for them to handle, but they don't feel comfortable removing themselves from the situation, lest they feel responsible. Of course, they're not responsible at all, but it's how they feel.

I've regretted telling most of the people who know about my suicidal ideation. None of them can really help. Those who are too uncomfortable bringing it up have avoided me which feels awful. Those who check up on me are constantly worried, which also feels awful.

 

[Stick]

I think you should make sure if you are actually being a burden. If you are, and you really don't want to pressure her, maybe you could talk about how you feel without mentioning your reaction to how you feel (wanting to ctb). That way she at least won't worry so much.
More than likely though, even if it's difficult for her to hear it might be important for her to hear. If you really want to tell her that badly then you might need to keep doing that.

 

[Meditation guide]

If you actually make solid plans to ctb can you trust her not to try to stop you or tell other people? That would be my main concern. In my opinion that has to be your own secret.

 

[tidalwxves]

Hello everyone, as the title says, I've feeling like shit recently, and also for the last two years, I have a girlfriend since past May 29th and that helped me a little bit but I don't feel well enough to continue having a "normal life", she's aware of everything that's happening in my head about suicidal thoughts, I tell her every time I feel like this but I know it's difficult for her to hear that, so I've been thinking to stop telling her, but I don't think that's a good idea because somehow telling her my thoughts and my feelings helps me reduce my anxiety and bad thoughts. I would like to hear your opinions.

It's good that you can open up to her and that vulnerability should help the relationship grow, but she's not a professional and there are some things that even though she will empathize she wont be prepared to help you fix. You need a therapist as well.