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My Melancholy

My Melancholy

No, I don't know either.
Oct 6, 2024
33
Even though I know it's silly to care about the aftermath of everything, I hate the thought of someone or people feeling personally responsible for what happened.

I get it, you feel immense sadness and guilt about what happened. Just know that it wouldn't have changed anything. I mean it in the nicest way possible, but also in the meanest.

I hate how every time I have a chance something happens and now I got to put it off, so no one gets their feelings hurt by thinking they were the last straw. I also just don't want to give them the credit. The camel's back has been broken thrice over at this point. Now we're finally putting it out of its misery.

Did it pile on? Maybe.
Was it the tipping point? Absolutely not. It likely wasn't even on the first page in the grand scheme of things.

IT'S NOT ALL ABOUT YOU

The worst part is that I know they mean well. They're horrified at the possibility that they could've said or done something to prevent such a "tragedy". But, I know better. I know that wouldn't have done anything, most likely would've made it worse in fact.

I guess, I just resent the fact they'll think it could've been solved so easily. Unfortunately, 99% of this problem is homegrown and not going away. That 1% was never going to be able to tip the scales in either direction.

Please don't think it's your fault. It was always a little more complicated than that.
 
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