P
Peachycherry
Member
- Oct 3, 2020
- 71
I like to imagine my life as being in the middle of an ocean. I'm sure most of you can relate to the scene I'm about to depict; mental illness is often compared to coming in waves. Right now, my head is over the water. I've managed to come back to the surface, after being submerged by a small wave for a while. Getting to see the surface after so long is rewarding; I don't have to struggle to catch my breath anymore. If I look at the horizon, I can even see the shore, with all its liveliness and awaiting opportunities. The problem is actually getting there. I'm already exhausted from fighting the previous wave, and I'm not even sure if I'll have enough energy to swim to the shore. Would it even be worth it? What if the shore ends up being unreachable? If I turn around, I can already make out a bigger wave approaching. Will I even survive this one?
What I mean by this metaphor is; how do you get yourself together in that small window of time where your mental illness isn't so bad? I feel like I finally have the opportunity to reach out for help, but it won't be so long before another wave of depression gets me distressed enough where I'll be considering suicide again. I've had a brief moment of epiphany this week where I've realised that I can't do this to my family; it wouldn't be fair for me to ctb without at least reaching out for help from them. Mind you, that I've never been able to approach them to speak about my anxiety/depression.
If anyone else has been in that situation before I'd be immensely grateful if you could share your experiences with me, what made you reach out for help in the first place, were there some tips that made hanging on to life easier for the time being?
What I mean by this metaphor is; how do you get yourself together in that small window of time where your mental illness isn't so bad? I feel like I finally have the opportunity to reach out for help, but it won't be so long before another wave of depression gets me distressed enough where I'll be considering suicide again. I've had a brief moment of epiphany this week where I've realised that I can't do this to my family; it wouldn't be fair for me to ctb without at least reaching out for help from them. Mind you, that I've never been able to approach them to speak about my anxiety/depression.
If anyone else has been in that situation before I'd be immensely grateful if you could share your experiences with me, what made you reach out for help in the first place, were there some tips that made hanging on to life easier for the time being?