Venting Is this all it'll ever be?

[squillykilly]

I feel nothing a lot of the time, I feel like I'm a social fuck up y'know, I always say the wrong things around the wrong people and I creep everyone out, I dunno if I'm autistic or just a psycho, I hope I'm autistic so I have an excuse to be a total weirdo. Is that bad to say? I dunno man, I've been terrible lately

 

[I Me & Myself]

It's tough not knowing "what's wrong" I can relate to that a lot. I don't know what my problem is either, I don't know why I'm a fuckup.

Craving something to blame it on, to be able to say "there's a reason for it it's not entirely my fault" is normal. It's okay that you "wish you were autistic" to just know what the fuck is happening. It's not a bad thing to say, it's very human and relatable.

Good luck finding out what it is. I'm still searching too.

 

[gayboy300]

I don't think that's bad to say to be honest. I've gone through cycles of friend groups, constantly being dropped by people for years and I've had similar thoughts of "I wish I knew wtf was wrong with me," I think I may've even also hoped that I was autistic at one point. Though having a diagnosis isn't a "perfect pill" so to speak (idk how to word that better, sorry), I feel like at least it provides somewhat of an explanation for behavior.