Is there any possible way to completely discard sexual/romantic attraction?

[Chr0nicAnhedonic]

I thought things were going well. My job is going well, my relationship with my family has improved, I'm making friends and being more social. Yet, none of this feels enough because I don't have a partner.

I develop crushes way too easily, and I don't know why. Is it the lack of socialization? Is it the low self esteem? Is it just some stupid personality quirk? Whatever it is, it's actively harming me.

I got a crush on one of my friends. I confessed to her, we talked about it, and it seemed like things were headed in the right direction. The very next day, I learn that she's actively pursuing a relationship with one of my other friends. I'm told that this wasn't my fault, that this was just bad timing, that I genuinely did have a chance with her, but did I? I'm stupid for thinking it would ever have worked. She lives on the other side of the goddamn country and I have a weird work schedule, why would it ever have worked? What was I thinking? Why would I let something as stupid as romance complicate what was already a pretty good friendship?

I need these feelings gone. They haven't ever served me, and only cause problems in my life. How do I finally get rid of them once and for all? Can I? If I can't, I'm sure CTB is in my future because I can't keep living like this.

 

[Dür Ktulhu]

The only thing that will help you is a pharmacological solution. It will suppress your libido, reduce your ability to become aroused, and diminish your capacity to achieve orgasm. I thought about this myself when I was 17-18 years old. The question is, how important is this to you? What are you willing to sacrifice for it? Are you ready to experiment on yourself? Usually, people want a "magical method" that will rid them of all their problems. I think you do too. But that's not how it works-it's not a gift, it's a deal; a sacrifice is needed. What are you willing to sacrifice for this? That is the main question.

 

[Chr0nicAnhedonic]

The only thing that will help you is a pharmacological solution. It will suppress your libido, reduce your ability to become aroused, and diminish your capacity to achieve orgasm. I thought about this myself when I was 17-18 years old. The question is, how important is this to you? What are you willing to sacrifice for it? Are you ready to experiment on yourself? Usually, people want a "magical method" that will rid them of all their problems. I think you do too. But that's not how it works-it's not a gift, it's a deal; a sacrifice is needed. What are you willing to sacrifice for this? That is the main question.

I guess it depends on the sacrifice. If no libido and inability to orgasm is the sacrifice I'd need to make, then at this point I'd be willing to make it. There's no point in having a libido if there's no one to share it with. What we call "love" (in the romantic sense) is nothing more than a biochemical reaction to get us to reproduce, after all. We like to ascribe all of these spiritual and mystical elements to it, but if you really get down to it that's all it is. I don't want to have children, so I have no use for it.

I'm not going to deny that I want a magical solution that'll fix everything. At the same time though, I'm not sure what exactly I'm giving up if there's little I have to give up to begin with. I'm sick of having to deal with these feelings and I just want to live my life unencumbered by them.

 

[Luvwww.com]

I wish that girls liked me
I don't wanna feel alone


Don't get any big ideas
They're not gonna happen

It's not even a sexual thing. I'm fine even if I never have sex. I just want to hug a girl and feel close to her, and talk to her.
I don't think that I would want to kill myself if I wasn't alone.

 

[Oreki]

I don't think there's much you can do about it. Developing feelings for someone is just part of human biology.
Research on romantic infatuation suggests it can last anywhere from a few weeks to around 12–18 months on average, and if nothing actually develops, those feelings usually fade as the brain chemistry settles back to normal.

From my own experience, every crush I've had stopped mattering to me after a while. Crushes can put you in a haze for a while, but it eventually clears. As cliche as it sounds, time does the job. The emotional tension you feel around your crush right now isn't permanent. It helps me to remind myself of something simple: you shouldn't want someone who doesn't want you back. Don't stay attached to people who don't return your feelings. Logic and chemistry don't always work in the same direction, but keeping that in mind has always helped me. Distraction also helps a lot in the beginning. It might also help to take some distance for a while. Sometimes cutting contact speeds up the process of moving on. I hope you feel better soon.

 

[Dür Ktulhu]

I guess it depends on the sacrifice. If no libido and inability to orgasm is the sacrifice I'd need to make, then at this point I'd be willing to make it. There's no point in having a libido if there's no one to share it with. What we call "love" (in the romantic sense) is nothing more than a biochemical reaction to get us to reproduce, after all. We like to ascribe all of these spiritual and mystical elements to it, but if you really get down to it that's all it is. I don't want to have children, so I have no use for it.

I'm not going to deny that I want a magical solution that'll fix everything. At the same time though, I'm not sure what exactly I'm giving up if there's little I have to give up to begin with. I'm sick of having to deal with these feelings and I just want to live my life unencumbered by them.

That's not the point, my dear friend. The absence of libido and inability to achieve orgasm are not a sacrifice- they are your gains. The sacrifice is different: the changes in your emotional background during the initial period of taking the medication while your body adapts, the altered perception - but this passes. Your problem is very easily solved - buy risperidone. Go to a psychiatrist, tell them you have a nervous tic and want risperidone -they'll prescribe it, no issues will arise. You could also initially augment this with a course of dexamethasone -it's an immunosuppressant, but it suppresses the sexual sphere very strongly; erections will disappear. I would start with a course of dexamethasone for about a month, along with risperidone, and then stay on risperidone indefinitely. About 80% of your sexual sphere and everything connected with it will disappear. These medications aren't intended for this purpose, but they will solve your problem.

And remember: there is nothing we cannot solve. Because we are human - we subdue nature, we subdue biology, and all living things. We are the gods now. But that's another story.