Discussion Is there a particular event that you feel shaped your sense of well-being?

[sindra]

For me it was way back in high school when a girl took her life shortly after I started ignoring her for no apparent reason. I wasn't the biggest factor in her decision but I probably contributed to it, I know I could've done something differently to prevent this and I'll never forgive myself for that.

 

[barkbark]

i think one of the biggest things that contributes to my mental issues is that my mom, no blame on her for this mind you, kinda trauma dumped on me a lot when i was growing up and i've kinda grown into a sorta quasi-therapist role for her on occasion where i listen to her vent about stuff. it's not really a singular event, more a singular thing that continuously goes on, but still.

and here's the thing. when the traumatic shit is that you were told your own god damn dad is a piece of shit who forced her into a relationship by stealthing her along with various other stories of SA, kidnapping, and similar traumas, it gets REALLY confusing on the psyche. like, i feel like i'm not supposed to be traumatized by this. it didn't happen to me yet i have a bunch of definitely ptsd like symptoms just from the secondhand of her recounting it and my perception on the world (and men as unfortunate as that is) changed immensely and immutably. i have no god damn idea how she lived through that, she's a god damn champion imo

 

[Abyssal]

I don't remember when, but one day when I was 8-10 I came to the realization that if I ever got to be in too much pain I could end it all. Nothing made me think that, and though I was being bullied it didn't make me genuinely suicidal yet (that wasnt until I got older and saw how it changed me). I just realized it one day all on my own. Hasn't left my mind since.

 

[julietelsewhere]

This was fairly recent, about 8 months ago, but I had an abusive boyfriend for about half a year. He broke up with me, though. The event was about a month after our breakup and I hadn't talked to him at all in between this. I was worried about a possible revenge porn issue with him and I made sure to tell him to never try to contact me in any way again. I told him it was bad for my mental health at the end of our (short) conversation, which was a massive understatement, but he said "I wasn't going to anyways, it was bad for my mental health too. Later"
It made me realize how disappointing the world is and made me a lot more cynical and misanthropic. Mostly due to the disregard and victim blaming, but many people asked me why I didn't want to keep in contact with him after this incident.
It made things click that no matter where I go or what I do, I'll probably never be truly respected, which is oftentimes the only thing I ask for. No point in expecting something when you know you'll inevitably get let down.

 

[Forever Sleep]

A few events in childhood very likely shaped me. 3 close family members dieing by the time I was 10 and then, growing up with a (suspected) narcissist. I expect I would be a different person now if those things hadn't happened.