Method Is there a method that would make my CTB seem like a natural or "unexplainable" dead?

[Done_Surviving]

I'm pretty much desperate at this point, I've been wishing I could suddenly drop dead ever since I was 8; and over time my mental health has only gotten worse to the point that every day I weight the pros and cons of throwing myself to heavy traffic. But the thing is that my loved ones and everyone around me are making a very big effort to make me feel better, they are paying for my therapy, my medicine and all the doctors I need to keep my chronic illness handled, as well as love-bombing me every time they see me.

I don't know how to make them understand that I'm simply just a lost cause, a failure, I have no future and I repressed most of my past, I'm pretty much just wasting time and being a leach who poisons everyone around me. I wish they hated me, it would make things so much easier. But they don't, they love me; and I love them too, as much as my selfish self can love, that's why I don't want to seem ungrateful, I don't want to hurt them by making it seem that all of their help was wasted.

But maybe, if I find a way to CTB that made it seem that I died of a heart attack, or organ failure, or something sudden and natural I won't hurt them as much. If I'm able to od on a drug that doesn't show up in toxicology test, or harm myself in a way the morticians don't find out, they would label my dead of "natural causes" and then my family will be able to move on more easily. Sure it will hurt, but not as much as knowing I CTB, they will be able to accept it, it would be sudden, no note, no remorse, no anything "God's plan". And then everything will be over, my family will be able to be free of me leaching onto them and I will finally be at peace.

 

[truede4th]

running infront of a car is quite fitting i think...i hope u r ok ily

 

[Done_Surviving]

running infront of a car is quite fitting i think...i hope u r ok il

yes, I just can't figure out how to make it look like an accident instead of you know an overly dramatic CBT attempt; also I would hate for the conductor of the vehicle to get in trouble. Still, Thank you for your kindness.

Great way to end up living with a spinal cord injury. Also extremely painful even if you do die.

Do not run in front of a car OP, it's a horrible way to go.

Noted.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Drowning could fit that bill.

 

[Done_Surviving]

Drowning could fit that bill.

I've tried, as well as holding my breath, as stupid as it seems. But survival instinc always kicks in at the end

I've tried, as well as holding my breath, as stupid as it seems. But survival instinc always kicks in at the end

I also once ate a sharp piece of chicken bone during a meal in hopes of choking, stupid thing was so small it only scratched my throat.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I've tried, as well as holding my breath, as stupid as it seems. But survival instinc always kicks in at the end

Yeah, I can see that happening. There's some other method that can be done before drowning. I can't think of what it's called right now. It's some kind of breathing-type deal to make one hyperventilate or something (I could be wrong on that) before drowning. I'm sure it can be found through search. I think it takes some practice to achieve whatever it is. I just remember reading about something like this, but didn't get too involved in it, since drowning isn't my method. But, there was something that was being discussed as a "precursor" to drowning. Sorry I can't remember more.

 

[Dayrain]

Yeah, I can see that happening. There's some other method that can be done before drowning. I can't think of what it's called right now. It's some kind of breathing-type deal to make one hyperventilate or something (I could be wrong on that) before drowning.

Do you mean Shallow Water Blackout?

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Do you mean Shallow Water Blackout?

Possibly?

 

[Maeve]

I've tried, as well as holding my breath, as stupid as it seems. But survival instinc always kicks in at the end.

Si s a bitch.
You can try and hyperventilate before going in the water if ur falling unconscious in the water it should be enough to get you and look natural.
Shallow water blackout i think ot is called but with that described technike i never managed to pass out while lying down just if i did it on the floor and then jumped up mabd if you do it like at the water and jump in it could be enough.

 

[ButterToast]

I'm pretty much desperate at this point, I've been wishing I could suddenly drop dead ever since I was 8; and over time my mental health has only gotten worse to the point that every day I weight the pros and cons of throwing myself to heavy traffic. But the thing is that my loved ones and everyone around me are making a very big effort to make me feel better, they are paying for my therapy, my medicine and all the doctors I need to keep my chronic illness handled, as well as love-bombing me every time they see me.

I don't know how to make them understand that I'm simply just a lost cause, a failure, I have no future and I repressed most of my past, I'm pretty much just wasting time and being a leach who poisons everyone around me. I wish they hated me, it would make things so much easier. But they don't, they love me; and I love them too, as much as my selfish self can love, that's why I don't want to seem ungrateful, I don't want to hurt them by making it seem that all of their help was wasted.

But maybe, if I find a way to CTB that made it seem that I died of a heart attack, or organ failure, or something sudden and natural I won't hurt them as much. If I'm able to od on a drug that doesn't show up in toxicology test, or harm myself in a way the morticians don't find out, they would label my dead of "natural causes" and then my family will be able to move on more easily. Sure it will hurt, but not as much as knowing I CTB, they will be able to accept it, it would be sudden, no note, no remorse, no anything "God's plan". And then everything will be over, my family will be able to be free of me leaching onto them and I will finally be at peace.

Something I've thought about, but isn't very nice...

Pretend to gain interest in the outdoors, pretend to have a normal life and go outdoors more and more. At some point, go on a long trip, maybe 3+ days, you can then go 'missing'. Ideally, you went to a place that involves cliffs so you can make it seem like you slipped. If it's just a forest, the search team might find you. And you can't use substance either since that will be detected. Place that involves the sea or a deep lake is also a decent idea as you can make it seem like an accident, drowning...

But these won't be 'quick' since if you use substance or tool, it will likely be concluded that you did kys.

Another way is to make it seem like you were killed, but that is hard, im not an autopsy expert, idk how to make it seem 'legit'. None of these are exactly good ways, and they're quite hard to pull off. If there's a tall and dangerous mountain near you, you can try climbing it in the winter and die there. Again, ideally you die from exposure, which isn't nice death by any mean.

The best one I got is maybe car crash. If you already have known interest in car/going fast brrrr, that helps. You can make it look like you're speeding and then losing control and crashing at high speed (needs to be 60++ mph or 100++ kmph for death, ideally 2x that for instant death) or speeding + falling off a cliff. Done in midnight on a secluded road is also ideal as there's not many to respond quickly. Problem with this, is that your death will be out of recklessness, not the best to save face.

 

[Jmall]

Have a few beers. Go to a river with white water. Jump from high up.

Most people around New England know not to swim in white water, and especially not to jump in, since you'll be sucked under. Survival instinct might kick in, but will be useless. There are multiple accidents every year in my state.

 

[Done_Surviving]

Do you mean Shallow Water Blackout?

I will definatly look into it, thought I only have access to pools during the warmer months of the years

Something I've thought about, but isn't very nice...

Pretend to gain interest in the outdoors, pretend to have a normal life and go outdoors more and more. At some point, go on a long trip, maybe 3+ days, you can then go 'missing'. Ideally, you went to a place that involves cliffs so you can make it seem like you slipped. If it's just a forest, the search team might find you. And you can't use substance either since that will be detected. Place that involves the sea or a deep lake is also a decent idea as you can make it seem like an accident, drowning...

But these won't be 'quick' since if you use substance or tool, it will likely be concluded that you did kys.

Another way is to make it seem like you were killed, but that is hard, im not an autopsy expert, idk how to make it seem 'legit'. None of these are exactly good ways, and they're quite hard to pull off. If there's a tall and dangerous mountain near you, you can try climbing it in the winter and die there. Again, ideally you die from exposure, which isn't nice death by any mean.

The best one I got is maybe car crash. If you already have known interest in car/going fast brrrr, that helps. You can make it look like you're speeding and then losing control and crashing at high speed (needs to be 60++ mph or 100++ kmph for death, ideally 2x that for instant death) or speeding + falling off a cliff. Done in midnight on a secluded road is also ideal as there's not many to respond quickly. Problem with this, is that your death will be out of recklessness, not the best to save face.

Honestly I think this might be the best option; the only thing is that I don't know if I'll get the chance to do it; do to my chronic illnes and my stupidity in general I'm not pretty movil. every time I try to drive I enter in panic mode and crash so I just gave it up all together. There are a lot of montains in my area, but not a lot of cliffs, actually natural deaths around the mountain sides are not very common, or at least not very reported.
Maybe I'll try it, if I get the oportunity, kinda afraid to die painfully of exposure but I am so apatic to life I don't really care at this point. I just hope I get the oportunity to do it, because due to my condition I'm barely left alone anymore.

 

[AnonAnon1234]

The only method I'm aware of that's undetectable post ctb is hypoxia via nitrogen. The down side is you need someone to remove the hood and tank after you're gone. But if you a achieve that then a post mortem won't be able to determine cause of death and it'll likely go 'unexplained' rather than suicide. That's what I'm after ideally.

 

[Dying Knight]

If I wanted to make my death looking like accidental, I'd definitely use drowning. The suffocation feelings and SI may be significantly reduced by hyperventilation, forcing the mood to be mad, and counting seconds that should distract the attention a bit. Passing out should happen in 3 - 5 minutes after the last breath.

 

[dmdmdm]

This might be stupid and I have got no clue but I think in Breaking Bad Walter White mentioned ricin as not being able to be identified Post mortem. I mean Walter is pretty smart soooo...

 

[snowcloud9]

There's a shallow water blackout megathread, but SWB is hard.

 

[Done_Surviving]

Thanks everybody for the ideas. Right now I'm nit aveilable to move anywhere on my on, but I think I found a wierd method that might work for me. I'll explain it all in another post

 

[Yoyo_honeybee]

Thanks everybody for the ideas. Right now I'm nit aveilable to move anywhere on my on, but I think I found a wierd method that might work for me. I'll explain it all in another post

Hey, I'm not able to see the posts on your profile for some reason. Would you be able to share the method?

 

[astonishedturnip]

I saw you have chronic illnesses, but if you're healthy enough to move around, death by misadventure is a good way to seem less suspicious. A mysterious fall during urban exploring, cliff diving, rock climbing, etc. does not raise eyebrows though you may have to establish some interest in the hobby first, bonus points if you drink.