Is life a competition?

[bayarea]

not sure if others feel this way. I think this happens a lot here where i live in the San Francisco Bay Area..
There is a lot of competition for jobs, GPA, money, colleges, etc here. Once you have a good gpa, people at the top are very competitive, and you still have to compete. if you are tired or depressed, you fall further behind. it's a grind, and if you stop to rest, you're already behind. Once you get in the right college, you have to work hard, get internships, to land the job thats the most prestigious and pays the most money. it's pretty stressful.
In life people also compete for jobs (the posters who applied to many jobs but still hasnt heard back) and love (maybe?)
What do you think?

 

[RainAndSadness]

Yes. The world revolves around selection and humans implemented a very similar system for their lives with capitalism, a system that is based on competition.

Of course we have a welfare system and health care for people who are in need - in most western countries at least, but if you can't compete, and I'm one of them thanks to my mental illness, you're out of the race. Done, forever. All my former class mates are currently studying, working, building their careers. They're functioning and making money. I have no chance of ever catching up to them again. I'm rotting at home, with barely any education except the basic graduation from school and unable to do anything thanks to my depression. This system is unfair and disadvantages struggling people. And people with disabilities face the same fate.

 

[puppy9]

In the past yes, but now no. It's the root of my sickness, being here make me realize that the cure of this societal neurosis is embedding oneself with the notion of death.

 

[Life sucks]

Life is inherently toxic and competitive. Everyone wants the resources for themselves and the whole system is based on competitiveness. All ideologies that support cooperation are just hypocrisy like religions or theoretical and never really implemented. The thing is even if one made a cooperative system, people will eventually abuse it and turn it to competitiveness.

 

[Life+me=error]

Survival of the fittest. Humans are not excluded from the iron law of natural selection.

 

[alizee]

I think life is a competition for many people but it never was for me. Some people have a dream they want to fulfill and it doesn't mean being the best compared to someone else. When you can't even strive for your dream anymore because too much time has passed or for whatever reason it can become devastating.

 

[not_a_robot]

It shouldn't be but the reality is, it is in our DNA. I had to learn the hard way that even though I don't want to compete with people, they are brutally competing against me whether I participate or not. They will tackle me just for being on the sidelines.

I actually find it kind of funny that even in my decrepit state, other people still see me as a formidable enough opponent to attack me constantly. Jealousy is the only honest compliment neurotypicals are capable of, all other flattery from them is just manipulation.
Sad but true.

 

[262653]

I don't have a job but I do compete and compare all my life... Likes, KDA score, IQ test score, player character's stats & stuff, how many fancy words were used... and of course talents, skills and knowledge. I compare all the time and I'm sick of it... Fuck. I'm lacking building blocks again. I think envy and jealousy are... maybe not the reasons I'm planning to die, but they are definitely going to be the chief executors. If I had no one to compare... People often complain that they had it too hard. I complain about having it too easy so far... No challenges I couldn't avoid, no incentive to run away from my family's house... no need to work to survive...
I often think there is no point in living if I'm not favorably and unusually special... and thanks to comparison I know I'm not. By judging the way people deal with life's challenges, I know I'm not. By observing my peers, older, younger... the way they talk, eyesight movement, gestures and how they react... their behavioral patterns... I can't make myself in peace when there are so much brighter minds and vigorous bodies, especially minds... I view it as an insult from higher order, of higher order.

 

[inconsequential]

For most people it is. Hence the phrase, "keeping up with the Joneses". Everyone is playing catch-up to someone else who is playing catch-up.

The only way to win the game is to opt out. To not play. To not follow their rules. To not even consider them.

I am useless and jobless and amazing and free.

 

[cornflowerblue]

It can be, or you can make your own rules and standards, then it's more of lateral differences than a vertical competition. It just takes some creativity to find ways to play without competing, but many do it. And even those who compete, are all competing for different prizes.

 

[AngelGirl]

I gave a good 30 seconds to think about this one.

And I voted for NO.
Being overly competitive one of the main reasons why I feel so suicidal today. I feel like I'm just not good enough and my life is not worth living. I also have really low self esteem which also goes together.

It just really makes me want to ctb so bad.

But I don't think any life is supposed to be this way. While I fail to overcome this issue, some people cope with it effectively. They are usually people who can resect themselves.

So no, life doesn't "have to" be a competition. People who don't take life as a competition probably have better mental health and I wish that was the case for me.

 

[cornflowerblue]

I gave a good 30 seconds to think about this one.

And I voted for NO.
Being overly competitive one of the main reasons why I feel so suicidal today. I feel like I'm just not good enough and my life is not worth living. I also have really low self esteem which also goes together.

It just really makes me want to ctb so bad.

But I don't think any life is supposed to be this way. While I fail to overcome this issue, some people cope with it effectively. They are usually people who can resect themselves.

So no, life doesn't "have to" be a competition. People who don't take life as a competition probably have better mental health and I wish that was the case for me.

Very true. Many people see competition, but don't realize they're the only one competing, everyone else is living their own life.

 

[not_a_robot]

I gave a good 30 seconds to think about this one.

And I voted for NO.
Being overly competitive one of the main reasons why I feel so suicidal today. I feel like I'm just not good enough and my life is not worth living. I also have really low self esteem which also goes together.

It just really makes me want to ctb so bad.

But I don't think any life is supposed to be this way. While I fail to overcome this issue, some people cope with it effectively. They are usually people who can resect themselves.

So no, life doesn't "have to" be a competition. People who don't take life as a competition probably have better mental health and I wish that was the case for me.

Thank you for pointing this out. It's one thing that frustrates me a lot, people feeling depressed because they constantly compare themselves to others. But I don't have the right words to change anybody's mind about it, I've tried. Social brainwashing is strong.

 

[bayarea]

Thank you for pointing this out. It's one thing that frustrates me a lot, people feeling depressed because they constantly compare themselves to others. But I don't have the right words to change anybody's mind about it, I've tried. Social brainwashing is strong.

Yeah i agree its really hard to not compare yourself to others. sometimes parents compare kids, and thats when it comes to a breaking point, the constant pressure of not being good enough. happens a lot of bay area unfortunately. Theres extra counselors that go to schools after some things happened but it just isnt possible to change a whole community's mindset.

 

[not_a_robot]

Yeah i agree its really hard to not compare yourself to others. sometimes parents compare kids, and thats when it comes to a breaking point, the constant pressure of not being good enough. happens a lot of bay area unfortunately. Theres extra counselors that go to schools after some things happened but it just isnt possible to change a whole community's mindset.

It takes a conscious choice to reject the system that dominates everyone else, most people are not strong enough. Nobody really wants to be an individual, they only want to be popular, even if being popular makes them miserable.
I don't understand it and I'm glad I don't.
What @inconsequential said, the only way to win is to refuse to play.

 

[cornflowerblue]

Thank you for pointing this out. It's one thing that frustrates me a lot, people feeling depressed because they constantly compare themselves to others. But I don't have the right words to change anybody's mind about it, I've tried. Social brainwashing is strong.

It's like saying, why do the airplanes always chase me and think they're sooo superior for outrunning me?

The airplane doesn't care, you're the one watching it's path, and the two of you aren't even trying to get to the same place so it's not like you can compare who arrived first.

Yeah i agree its really hard to not compare yourself to others. sometimes parents compare kids, and thats when it comes to a breaking point, the constant pressure of not being good enough. happens a lot of bay area unfortunately. Theres extra counselors that go to schools after some things happened but it just isnt possible to change a whole community's mindset.

I think despite all the complaining, some people feel comfortable in the competition, because deep down they don't want a lack of competing, what they want is to win. It's hard to admit that you're the one who wants to compete, so instead people act like they're forced into it. This isn't true for everybody, but it's definitely not uncommon. People tend to assume everyone thinks and wants the same as they do, it's like the homophobic closeted men who say "being gay is a choice", they only say that because living a straight life IS a choice for them, they don't want to admit to themselves that they're gay, and they genuinely think that all men are consciously deciding to be with women despite actually being attracted to other men.

 

[Severen]

Depends on what you want in life. For me, no. I couldn't care less about competing in some stupid ass rat race.

 

[262653]

Thank you for pointing this out. It's one thing that frustrates me a lot, people feeling depressed because they constantly compare themselves to others. But I don't have the right words to change anybody's mind about it, I've tried. Social brainwashing is strong.

I think the right sequence of words would be something like:
Giving an example of a game that is destructive and doesn't serve the player. Something in the spirit of: "Let's play a game where I punch you in the face whenever I want and you do nothing about it. Deal?" (Oversimplified, there have to be better examples.)
Show the gains and the losses for the punched player in two, maybe three scenarios: play the game, avoid the game, change the rules of the game to more favorable ones.
Ask for a preferable scenario. People usually don't like to be punched in the face and choose either to avoid or introduce retaliation rule for example.
Draw a parallel between given example and the game of competition that makes the player depressed, show possible scenarios. Parallels in theory should be very effective because you don't burden another person with new concepts but draw links between things that person already familiar with. Just as it is much easier to make a sketch based on a clearly visible image than to raise one from the depth of your mind.
Ask for a preference again.

Of course its probably more complex than that. Habit of competition could be ingrained since childhood, like in my case, could make a strong influence on developing some of the core values, beliefs and attitudes. And even if the person understands the destructive nature of the habit -- our minds aren't Bayes network. Maybe in the bigger picture... Just because we realized a habit doesn't serves us doesn't mean that all other influenced habits would update automatically, but its just the start of a journey... And how you pointed out some of us plainly aren't capable enough to make a meaningful change in the constant flux of life. People have to upkeep jobs, marriage, kids... deal with cultural programming... its how you said it, a bloatware burdening our cognitive power. Oh I love those puny words... Or a spoon theory where all spoons were allocated to daily activities...

 

[Thorn]

Success depends on how manipulative you can be, and if your conscience allows you to ride on other's backs. Even our local business consultant admitted, that modern business is built on legal theft, and on the skill of executing it. The good old days of bartering are long over.
They still like to say "you get what you pay for", but that is just a joke and mockery.

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

Humans have lost all other forms of currency other than money. People used to distinguish themselves by way of spiritual growth, piety, being altruistic and honorable etc. Now all that matters is the almighty dollar. We're brought up to be selfish because it's become the only thing that matters. How could we not see life as a competition?

 

[TheNorthernSilence]

Yes, or at least it feels like it. I think one of the best things about death is that you don't have to prove anything to anyone anymore and compete. I'm just so tired of this current way of living because I fail to meet society's expectations, like getting a job for example. I have a bachelor's degree but it's worth of nothing, thank god I haven't got any student loan or any other loans. I'm just not meant for this world.

 

[Divine Trinity]

Has only lived in the US (5% global) in a handful states at best = experienced enough to boldly generalize about highly abstract concepts.

Conflates "life" for all people in human history with the current model of capitalism...

We can make everything into a competition, expect every aspect of daily interactions to suck and to have a stroke at 40.

 

[TAW122]

I believe life is indeed a competition even if we deny it and claim that we are only doing the best we can for ourselves. It is human nature to be competitive and to size each other up (as well as other species). I believe that is part of why our species have made many discoveries, advancements in technology, and also survived for so long. (hundreds of thousands of years)