Venting Is it too early to end it

[Hihihehehuhu]

Im just 18, when i was younger i tought i'd end it just before 18 but i started social media and started to see other people's lives

Im living in a small beach town, its so small that most villages are just more modern than here. There isnt even a big hospital or police.
I have never been out of town i have never tasted other food than my mother makes, i have never even seen a big city, i never had friends or a girlfriend either. My life is just studying and rotting in my room. I feel like im losing my teenage years. I feel like it would be a waste if i didnt taste other culture's food, lots of types of sweets, friends that actually understand me, a cute girlfriend etc. I havent even started my life yet. My younger self would laugh at me for these toughts but i just want to eat tasty food and hug someone i love before i die

 

[aliasblue.]

Im just 18, when i was younger i tought i'd end it just before 18 but i started social media and started to see other people's lives

Im living in a small beach town, its so small that most villages are just more modern than here. There isnt even a big hospital or police.
I have never been out of town i have never tasted other food than my mother makes, i have never even seen a big city, i never had friends or a girlfriend either. My life is just studying and rotting in my room. I feel like im losing my teenage years. I feel like it would be a waste if i didnt taste other culture's food, lots of types of sweets, friends that actually understand me, a cute girlfriend etc. I havent even started my life yet. My younger self would laugh at me for these toughts but i just want to eat tasty food and hug someone i love before i die

If you're having seconds thoughts about suicide, don't do it.

 

[redbathingduck]

It sounds like there's still things you want to try and do that might make things better for you. I think it would be good to try and pursue those things, any chance you could move out or go to college in some other place? Sounds like a change of location could help you regardless. Taking your own life will always be an option but these things that you still want to try out won't be if you go through with it. Ultimately only you can decide when the time to go is right but I think it'd be worth to try the things you mentioned and put your energy in that instead

 

[Hihihehehuhu]

It sounds like there's still things you want to try and do that might make things better for you. I think it would be good to try and pursue those things, any chance you could move out or go to college in some other place? Sounds like a change of location could help you regardless. Taking your own life will always be an option but these things that you still want to try out won't be if you go through with it. Ultimately only you can decide when the time to go is right but I think it'd be worth to try the things you mentioned and put your energy in that instead

I'll move out once i pass university exam, if i cant pass i'll kms %100, if i pass, i dont know what would happen, i think i'll just try to live...

 

[ThatStateOfMind]

I agree with the other sentiments here, it sounds like you still want to live. I recommend waiting, and seeing how life plays out.

The way I see it, if I still see hope (which I currently do), then I want to pursue a better life, and if it doesn't work out, CTB is always an option. But currently, I recommend trying to live life, and seek happiness.

 

[Hihihehehuhu]

You haven't lived yet, why do you want to die ?

Are you genuienly asking why do i want do die or just saying ? If you are really asking then my reason is academic pressure (i must to study 14 hours a day) and family abuse and trauma

 

[MildlyBetter]

Why not attempt a normal life first? If it ever gets too bad sure go ahead and ctb but imo if you are having second thoughts it's a sign that your life isn't finished just yet, I know it's a silly sentiment but hey it might get better. This is at least how I approach my life, with the thought that ctb is always an option. You might still have a chance to do something meaningful.

 

[ThisIsLife]

Are you genuienly asking why do i want do die or just saying ? If you are really asking then my reason is academic pressure (i must to study 14 hours a day) and family abuse and trauma

I wanted to start a sentence with "you haven't lived yet," but forgot what i wanted to say next and proceeded to ask why do you want to die and posted without realising i haven't erased the first sentence. I'm tired :)

 

[Hihihehehuhu]

I wanted to start a sentence with "you haven't lived yet," but forgot what i wanted to say next and proceeded to ask why do you want to die and posted without realising i haven't erased the first sentence. I'm tired :)

Its okay loll i get it ~

 

[Aisley]

When the platitude "it gets better" is thrown around a lot, it's because it does get better for a lot of people. Mostly for people whose problems come from ass parents and shit towns. You gotta taste pussy before you go. Cash in your first paycheck and play. And even if you fail the test, you can get a job flipping burgers and move out. Once you answer to yourself, and have stretched into that being and that power, if you still want to die, then at least you lived a little first.

 

[watchingthebuses]

You can always take the bus if it doesn't work out, you're not on a time crunch. Try out things first and see if it'll bring you some joy before ending it. It'd be a shame to at least not get an attempt at trying things you want to try.

 

[gar3z]

that's pretty relatable. also 18 and live in a pretty small town. i don't even leave home and force myself to study nowadays. the worst part is it might continue for a whole year. i have tons of things i haven't experienced yet and honestly feel like that would be a total waste of a life. i want to enroll at a university and make myself proud. i'm not sure if it will make things any better but, it most certainly is worth a try.

you're the one to decide if it's too early or not but honestly if you've came this far, might as well make sure you at least know how it feels like to go on a trip with your friends or to live all by yourself before making the choice.

 

[FuneralCry]

There is no such thing as it being too early to leave this world, the reality is that when to leave is a completely personal decision that can only be made by the individual. Nobody is obligated to continue existing if they don't wish to and nobody should be forced to stay here against their wishes, the right to die is a basic human right that all humans have.

 

[Death is my goal]

the more i live the more i regret not killing myself earlier, but sure if you see that things may work out for you just wait it out

 

[ThatStateOfMind]

that's pretty relatable. also 18 and live in a pretty small town. i don't even leave home and force myself to study nowadays. the worst part is it might continue for a whole year. i have tons of things i haven't experienced yet and honestly feel like that would be a total waste of a life. i want to enroll at a university and make myself proud. i'm not sure if it will make things any better but, it most certainly is worth a try.

you're the one to decide if it's too early or not but honestly if you've came this far, might as well make sure you at least know how it feels like to go on a trip with your friends or to live all by yourself before making the choice.

I just wanna say, I can relate as well, I'm going to college this summer and I feel excited for it. Not university though, because it's too expensive for me, community college is what I'm doing and I'm hoping FAFSA will cover it all. The college is pretty cheap, and it's in state so I get the cheaper in state tuition.

I do agree, only OP can make the decision, but it does seem like they have apprehension so that's to be noted. I think they should try life alone first as well.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I'd say- if you still have the desire to do stuff in life- definitely go for it. Things did improve for me for a while when I left home for university. Not to say they definitely will improve but they might. I think a major factor is to still have that curiosity about life- which you seem to have- so- why not pursue it? I wish you luck.

 

[soolka]

I think it is too early, if you're having these thoughts. Please only consider ending it when you're 100% sure.

 

[Himalayan]

Im just 18, when i was younger i tought i'd end it just before 18 but i started social media and started to see other people's lives

Im living in a small beach town, its so small that most villages are just more modern than here. There isnt even a big hospital or police.
I have never been out of town i have never tasted other food than my mother makes, i have never even seen a big city, i never had friends or a girlfriend either. My life is just studying and rotting in my room. I feel like im losing my teenage years. I feel like it would be a waste if i didnt taste other culture's food, lots of types of sweets, friends that actually understand me, a cute girlfriend etc. I havent even started my life yet. My younger self would laugh at me for these toughts but i just want to eat tasty food and hug someone i love before i die

It's too early man. Instead of thinking if it's too late or too early, start from now thinking of why you want to die. Fear? Feeling weak and uncapable? Loneliness?
You can learn how to deal whit everything, but you can also choose that every one of those is a human need and that you need those throw in your hand for free, because you're human and you can only function whit those. Ps: you will only achieve stagnation in the last scenario.
Be strong and you will be able to reach for anything, whitout caring about the pain. Only regret you can have is time, but 18 is very early.
I won't say that it gets better, but you can indeed become a fucking dragon when it comes to resilience. Fight for everything and i mean fight! Don't wait.

 

[borderline-feline]

It's not too early. Age is irrelevant; you still have the right to die on your own terms if that's what you truly want. You shouldn't have to go through that many years of pain in order to be able to make an informed decision about whether or not you want to continue existing.

 

[Meursault4]

yea I'm kind of (was?) in the same situation as you, no real friends, no opportunities to meet ppl, small town, etc. I think if you plan on doing college or moving somewhere else, life will definitely get better, not a complete fix, but better.
I recommend bullshitting excuses to get out, my parents were really pushy on me studying and doing work around the house and would get pissy if I wanted to go out.
Good luck, it's fucking painful watching others live the life you want while you have to watch and rot away