• If you haven't yet, we highly encourage you to check out our Recovery Resources thread!
  • Hey Guest,

    As you know, censorship around the world has been ramping up at an alarming pace. The UK and OFCOM has singled out this community and have been focusing its censorship efforts here. It takes a good amount of resources to maintain the infrastructure for our community and to resist this censorship. We would appreciate any and all donations.

    Bitcoin Address (BTC): 39deg9i6Zp1GdrwyKkqZU6rAbsEspvLBJt

    Ethereum (ETH): 0xd799aF8E2e5cEd14cdb344e6D6A9f18011B79BE9

    Monero (XMR): 49tuJbzxwVPUhhDjzz6H222Kh8baKe6rDEsXgE617DVSDD8UKNaXvKNU8dEVRTAFH9Av8gKkn4jDzVGF25snJgNfUfKKNC8

  • Security update: At around 2:28AM EST, the site was labeled as malicious by Google erroneously, causing users to get a "Dangerous site" warning in most browsers. It appears that this was done by mistake and has been reversed by Google. It may take a few hours for you to stop seeing those warnings.

    If you're still getting these warnings, please let a member of staff know.
qualityOV3Rquantity

qualityOV3Rquantity

Student
Jul 27, 2024
191
I have IBS, irritable bowel syndrome. it's far from the worst chronic illness, but it affects my life every day and has changed my entire life since I was diagnosed. It's greatly worsened my depression too. The thing is, about a year after first being diagnosed, my IBS is quite 'under control'. I still have pain and discomfort every day, but I'm able to function - I work an online job, I go out with friends sometimes, I play piano, I read books, I live at home with my parents (although I'm in my mid-20s...) I eat as diverse a diet as I can tolerate. I'm on two medications - one for IBS and one for depression, and I think both of them help. I meditate and do breathing exercises that help reduce my anxiety. I go to church every week and do a biweekly Bible study. I could probably travel, so long as I plan in advance with my restrictive diet and medications.

And yet, it still feels like my life is over. I can't get rid of this horrible feeling that my life is forever worse than it was, that I'll never again be as healthy or feel as good as I did in the past (and I was passively suicidal even before my illness!). It feels so empty, like it's all pointless now that I'm chronically ill. And I feel like I have no certainty about the future - any day, my illness could just get worse for no reason and stay bad. So I feel like I can never get married or have kids, because I can't depend on my health to stay at this level and for me to remain functional. I know to a degree, this is true for everyone - even a perfectly healthy person could get cancer or get paralyzed in a car accident without warning, and their life would be forever changed too. But for me it feels much closer, much more likely - like I am slowly dying, rotting away, like I'm already living in a sort of 'palliative care', just maximizing my quality of life before my inevitable demise?

What can I do in my situation? What can I do to improve my health, mental or physical, and just to live a better life? I'm open to any suggestions really, no matter how crazy. I've even tried a carnivore diet for a few months previously, although I eventually went off it because it seemed to cause me fatigue and constipation. Just saying that to illustrate how open-minded I am about suggestions to improve my situation lol.
 
  • Love
  • Hugs
Reactions: idelttoilfsadness21 and ma0
hidingblankets

hidingblankets

New Member
Feb 17, 2023
2
The way I see it, things might never be the same and our lives don't look the same as many others... but we're still here, you know? We need time to grieve the function we've lost, but that doesn't mean there's nothing left. Today you are here and there are things you can do, to lose sight of them chasing what's already gone is a very quick way to spiral. It's the same case for the future - it's a bit cheesy, but if we don't know if tomorrow we'll be worse, it's just more reason to make the most of today, right?
I've got a degenerative condition that will likely paralyze me eventually, but today my limbs still mostly work and I'm going to make that everyone's problem! That's how I personally cope. I hope your body and mind are both kinder to you, and that you can find some measure of peace.
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: Life_and_Death and qualityOV3Rquantity
Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ I'm............
Jul 1, 2020
7,002
I've got a degenerative condition that will likely paralyze me eventually, but today my limbs still mostly work and I'm going to make that everyone's problem!
i might become paralyzed (lower back issues, hoping it doesnt get worse) and i cant. physical is lower on my list of reasons to ctb, but its high on my fear list
(i mean this as a good thing)



@qualityOV3Rquantity, have you tried youtube (or any platform/blog etc really), looking for people with your condition that you can relate to? someone thats going through it might have better or more specific advice, or for some people seeing someone else being "ok" can be encouraging.
 

Similar threads

Y
Replies
1
Views
122
Suicide Discussion
FuneralCry
FuneralCry
riddlerenjoyer
Replies
4
Views
161
Suicide Discussion
riddlerenjoyer
riddlerenjoyer
PlutonianRooster
Replies
3
Views
130
Suicide Discussion
PlutonianRooster
PlutonianRooster
nails
Replies
0
Views
57
Suicide Discussion
nails
nails
qualityOV3Rquantity
Replies
2
Views
231
Suicide Discussion
Unknown21
Unknown21