Is it likely that the desire for connection can only be realized in death?

[Ambivalent1]

After you die your atoms separate from you and merge back into everything. It's not a connection you can feel but it appears to be the ultimate form of connection. I stay alive hoping to find people to connect with but it just doesn't happen, and even if it did, is it really connection when people can never know you as you know yourself? Staying alive could actually be preventing me from fulfilling my greatest wish.

 

[_Gollum_]

Interesting way to think about it. I've often been attracted to the idea of "joining the eternal" through death, in much the same way you described (ie. by decomposing and merging with the external environment).

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

It seems like you answered your own question: you'll likely find connection but just in a different and possibly better form than you're currently craving for. The kind of connection that you can find in the realm of the living is something you can get too though but it might involve having to try things you maybe won't like.