Tackingintothewind

Tackingintothewind

Mage
Mar 2, 2021
530
I hate that whenever I come out to someone it's like facing an interrogation, everyone seems to think its impossible and just tells me the right guy or girl hasn't come along yet or that I'm lying. No one for the most part accepts it at face value except on here. I'm curious how others like me deal with this.
 
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WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,164
I became asexual and aromantic last year. I just had no interest in sex and relationships.
Now, I feel like having a gf and sex again lol.

It's not impossible to "suffer" from this condition. I used to have some asexual friends and they're doing quite good in life. Don't worry too much about it.

Also, have you made a research about any treatments? Maybe there's something which can help but if you're not interested in it, who cares? You can be a great human anyway.
 
Tackingintothewind

Tackingintothewind

Mage
Mar 2, 2021
530
I'm not worried about it. It's not why I'm on here. It's just an extra irritation. It's not something that I chose, it's just what I am.
My gay friend tell someone he is gay and noone questions it or suggests treatment.
I tell someone I'm asexual and everyone questions it. It's not a phase it's not being tired of sex. It's a complete lack of attraction or desire.
 
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WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,164
I'm not worried about it. It's not why I'm on here. It's just an extra irritation. It's not something that I chose, it's just what I am.
My gay friend tell someone he is gay and noone questions it or suggests treatment.
I tell someone I'm asexual and everyone questions it. It's not a phase it's not being tired of sex. It's a complete lack of attraction or desire.

Those who question your condition can go to hell. You're just like this and if people can't understand it, you're better without them in your life.
In my case, people can't understand that I love being alone and not leaving my apartment at all, just go out to get food.

I'm glad you can accept the way you are. That's really nice.
 
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Tackingintothewind

Tackingintothewind

Mage
Mar 2, 2021
530
I just posted it today because I was questioned on it again, a minor irritation but still. I'm fed up of it.
I know what its like to want to be alone, but for me that's how my depression manifests.
 
boydiablo

boydiablo

Member
Feb 22, 2021
17
I hate that whenever I come out to someone it's like facing an interrogation, everyone seems to think its impossible and just tells me the right guy or girl hasn't come along yet or that I'm lying.
I'm also asexual and have had a mixed bag of experiences. I completely get what you mean about facing an interrogation -- I've gotten a lot of quite personal questions from a number of people I've mentioned it to. For the most part they've just seemed to be trying to get their head around it. Or at least that's what I tell myself. A lot of people can't imagine what it's like to feel no sexual attraction at all. Of course, there are also the people who will try to convince you that you do/should experience it. I've gotten that from some SOs. For people like that, I gotta second this:
Those who question your condition can go to hell.
It sounds like you're on good terms with your asexual identity. People who are going to be assholes about it don't deserve your time. You're secure in it, you know yourself, screw those who try to say otherwise.
 
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signifying nothing

signifying nothing

-
Sep 13, 2020
2,553
I think if I had to label myself I'd say I'm asexual. It's complicated though. I have sexual desires, but I would have extreme difficulty translating those desires safely into reality, so I largely suppress that side of myself.

But then I have difficulty trusting anyone in any kind of relationship, however brief, so I don't ever get anywhere near the point of discussing it or have people question me about it.

Perhaps that makes me more of an autosexual, idk? I don't really like labelling myself tbh.
 
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Celerity

Celerity

shape without form, shade without colour
Jan 24, 2021
2,733
Man, I wish. Then I wouldn't be so goddamn disappointed about not getting any. Wanting someone who will never like you back sucks.
 
Lucien

Lucien

A Nameless Monster
Mar 7, 2021
130
Sex was just a way to explore why I felt zero connection with others.

Haven't experienced any shred of romantic attraction so far.

I don't feel confused about it anymore. I got my answers. That's all that matters. If someone around me finds it unnerving I won't bat an eye. There are more interesting questions I can consider instead and an endless supply of people.

When it comes to a technique for stopping any conversation, well, I just walk away a lot of the time.
 
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Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
20,718
I used to think I was asexual a few years ago but it turned out I just have absurdly high standards. Lowering them hasn't proved very successful either.
 
Tackingintothewind

Tackingintothewind

Mage
Mar 2, 2021
530
I know it's not high standards with me. The moment someone comes on to me I simply recoil.
 
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Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
20,718
I know it's not high standards with me. The moment someone comes on to me I simply recoil.
I tend to cringe too when people say they find me attractive usually because they're being condescending about it and even if someone attractive was genuinely into me I would first assume that it must be part of some scam or prank or other manipulative purpose...
 
Tackingintothewind

Tackingintothewind

Mage
Mar 2, 2021
530
Nah I know I'm attractive to some people, not everyone by any means but some. I'm okish if they flirt with me as long as they back down once I tell them I'm not interested. But I've had guys not listen to that and well that's when I recoil
 
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Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
20,718
Nah I know I'm attractive to some people, not everyone by any means but some. I'm okish if they flirt with me as long as they back down once I tell them I'm not interested. But I've had guys not listen to that and well that's when I recoil
That's quite understandable whether or not someone is asexual. I've actually had my fair share of that too (from guys).
 
Lucien

Lucien

A Nameless Monster
Mar 7, 2021
130
I tend to cringe too when people say they find me attractive usually because they're being condescending about it and even if someone attractive was genuinely into me I would first assume that it must be part of some scam or prank or other manipulative purpose...
Some people would date a Sasquatch.
 
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GenesAndEnvironment

GenesAndEnvironment

Autistic loser
Jan 26, 2021
5,739
Sex is temporary, death is eternal. I won't get distracted.
 
Meretlein

Meretlein

Moderator
Feb 15, 2019
1,199
I am asexual and aromantic. I don't tell anyone in real life to avoid being seen as strange or not taken seriously.
 
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