Invalidated Feelings

[lopbunny]

I try to tell my mom the things that go on in my head, hint at the fact that I hate my life and my job and am miserable every day and want to die, somewhat hoping she'll catch on and help me but she always gives me the same responses - "Be more positive", "stop being so pessimistic", "you'll be moving down here again in 5 months, it's not that long", "well at least you have a job", "everyone hates their jobs sometimes", "you'll be fine", "well you're going to graduate in 2 years so you can get a new job then, it's not that long", etc.
She's always so worried about me and gets on to me for cutting and stuff but refuses to accept the fact that I'm not okay, that I'm depressed and suicidal. She wants me to talk to her about my feelings but she always invalidates them when I do talk to her. She practically kicked/rushed me out of the house the moment I graduated high school so I'm in a really tight spot but any time I tell her that she will be like "I didn't kick you out, you chose to move" which is 100% a lie. I didn't want to move, you just HEAVILY implied that I needed to leave bc I was the last kid left in the nest and you want your alone time with your new hubby.

 

[WornOutLife]

I'm really sorry to hear you've received those kinds of answers. I know how much it sucks.
Everytime I talked to my parents of friends about things like that, they answered the same.
I guess most people will never be able to understand the hell we're going through.

Anyway, wish you the best and hope things get better somehow!

Hugs!

 

[Life_and_Death]

i had a similar problem with my husband. have you tried being more upfront with her about it? youre most likely talking to someone that doesnt understand and aside from the "i want to die" part, can be for the most part brushed off as typical human complaints especially if she doesnt realize or know how much struggle it is actually causing you. instead of hinting at it, why not talk to her and while youre at it tell her how her reactions made you feel.

 

[◄✵火✵〇°Ø•WÅR•Ī°〇✵火✵►]

I'm sorry for what's happening to you, op. It really is unfair that people keep bringing beings into this world only to kick them out and almost throw them away when they become "burdens". This is really unfair. I'm sorry I don't have anything better to say. We're here for you.

 

[blue_muse]

Much easier said than done; try shrugging off your mother's platitudes by distancing yourself emotionally because it sounds like she'll never be the support source you want her to be. By making this thread, you've already come to a realisation in more ways than you think .

 

[LunarPyotr]

I personally wouldn't thing about any support form your mother. She will be probably be always in denial till something bad happens. If a talk with her didn't worked out after repeating everything over and over again.
I would probably search for support at other family members if I were you but do this only if you really want to do this and not because some random guy from the Internet told you to do that.