Discussion inpatient hospitalization stories?

[devil]

anyone else been through inpatient?
I've had to do it 3 times now because of my shitty attempts

did you find it helpful being in there or did it make you feel worse?
no one gave a shit about me in there, I stayed in bed all day everyday for a week and finally they had to just get rid of me.
hooray for our shitty mental health program, they throw us in a cage and poke at us until we either explode or follow by their rules

 

[Jessica5]

Never been in inpatient care. Anyway, from what I've heard, it seems like a place that's designed to make people more suicidal than they already are.

 

[devil]

Never been in inpatient care. Anyway, from what I've heard, it seems like a place that's designed to make people more suicidal than they already are.

yup you're exactly right

 

[Orin]

I had an acquaintance who served in the Vietnam War. Not sure about the exact sequence of events but i remember he had married a woman from Laos, and shortly after this, his wife was killed from the bombings of Laos by US forces. Basically he went into a mental breakdown and had to be hospitalized. Imagine that: your own wife killed by your own comrades in arms.

He felt so broken and desperate to end his life; so he charged at the reinforced glass of his hospital room, shattered it, and fell maybe 2-3 stories.

Unfortunately he survived to tell the tale.

 

[Meretlein]

I got psych warded when I was 17 and I was pissed. I broke a few things and had security called on me everyday I was in there.

They stopped accepting new patients because of me and they tried to transfer me to a new hospital but that hospital thought I was too unstable and rejected me. I got released after 5 days. It was hell.

 

[Jen0804]

I spent six months in a ward

I went in ill
I came out worse
Stayed ill and lost hope I could ever Be helped by the system

ALl they gave me was dyskinesia from medication
Weight gain and a wasted six months of my life

 

[lifeisbutadream]

I had an acquaintance who served in the Vietnam War. Not sure about the exact sequence of events but i remember he had married a woman from Laos, and shortly after this, his wife was killed from the bombings of Laos by US forces. Basically he went into a mental breakdown and had to be hospitalized. Imagine that: your own wife killed by your own comrades in arms.

He felt so broken and desperate to end his life; so he charged at the reinforced glass of his hospital room, shattered it, and fell maybe 2-3 stories.

Unfortunately he survived to tell the tale.

Damn

 

[SinisterKid]

5 days, done voluntarily. I was so disgusted with complete lack of of anything constructive, I left and vowed to never go back. Its one of the reasons that next time has to be the last time. I cannot be caged again, voluntarily or otherwise.

 

[LMFAO FOCKERS]

I spent 3 months in a psych ward. Almost kept me from graduating HS (was a big deal for me b/c I was a few grades ahead). I had to fake family reconciliation to get out. They made me go home on weekends and return to hospital during weekdays for at least a month like some kind of dumb work release jail program. I faked playing Connect 4 and stupid ass card games with parents to get out. WTF

I got out a week before midterms and had to cram down 3 months of classwork to graduate on time. I passed them all and graduated what a nightmare.

As a result my parents wouldnt allow me to go away to college. All that work busting my ass to pass midterms was for nothing! What a$$holes!

Was kicked out of my home a few months later. I never returned and became more successful than anyone in my family. F*CK THEM!

5 days, done voluntarily. I was so disgusted with complete lack of of anything constructive, I left and vowed to never go back. Its one of the reasons that next time has to be the last time. I cannot be caged again, voluntarily or otherwise.

I hear you. While I was in me and a bunch of other girls in the psych ward staged an uprising to protest how patients were being treated. We ran the halls screaming throwing shit down on the floor in the hallways. They tranquilized us all and put us in straight jackets. I have claustrophobia so being restrained was like a brush with death for me.

I'd rather CTB than ever be in a state hospital again.

 

[LongTimeComing]

I spent about a week in inpatient after my attempt. I was scared as hell and stayed in my room for a few days, then I was at the nurses' post and some people around my age started talking to me and they were my saviors. They had all been in before and let me know that if I wanted out, I had to go to group therapies and socialize because the technicians take notes on our behaviors. I was going to fake it to get out, but I actually started to feel better with my new friends and excitement to actually see the world and eat good food again. I became a social butterfly and when my release date came, I was actually happy. Immediately after leaving the facility, I was overwhelmed and no longer feel like the person I was. I'm completely numb, yet my behavior is worse; I do far more impulsive things than before because my senses are too dull to feel fear now. It has changed my entire perspective on reality and I still want to die, but want to indulge in things that distract me from that in order to make others loosen their grip on me that they made when they thought I was dead. Just trying to be happy before I make a well planned and fatal attempt in the future.

 

[done_so_done]

I've been there twice. If anything, it made me worse. I didn't even attempted for suicide, it was just authorities (doctors) saying that I'm a danger to myself and therefore, need to be locked up. Indeed, I didn't even attempt suicide and there I was, under the lock (wtf!). If anything, it made me feel even worse about myself. It didn't help me at all. I wish they stopped this barbaric practice. What is wrong with people?!

 

[deathenvoy]

I was inpatient 6 times during last two years. Now I know psychiatric care won't help me (I know I am slow learner).
First time was the worst. They tried on me many different medications, including lithium and benzodiazepines that made me shake uncontrollably when they were stopped. They let me out with suicidal plans. Week after going out I had suicide attempt.

 

[ladolcemorte]

I have been in various psych wards in various places. (In fact I'm thinking of writing a book called "psych wards across the country"). I would say that a few of the hospitalizations were very helpful. A few made me worse. (One made me A LOT worse). And the rest were neutral: neither helpful nor harmful.

 

[wiIIow]

I've had several hospitalizations, I can't recall the exact number. somewhere around 5 or 6. I'm not sure how to compile them into a story, it's all a blur of humiliation, dehumanization, desperation, pills, fear, anger, sleeplessness, bullshit art projects and team building exercises... most of my stays haven't been all too helpful. Many nurses talked down to me, treated me like a child. One of my stays I was shitting black due to the charcoal which I don't remember being given. One doctor remembered me from a stay 5 years prior. One stay made my dad cry, which I've only witnessed twice in my life. I dunno. Too many random pieces to try and fit together, my memories during those times are shite.

I do know that my last stay, few years back, was the biggest fucking joke on the planet. Just put me in a room, nobody paid any attention to me so I just read my Charles Bukowski book that I never remembered to return to the library (or tried, over the constant screams of the poor fucking chick next door). Nurses were obviously annoyed by my very presence anyway, so whatever... Finally, after 3 days, a doctor came into my room. Sat down with his clipboard, which he didn't look up from. Asked me a few basic questions, barely scraping the surface and just checking boxes on the list. 5 minutes and he was done, got up and left without any further words. I guess from that brief interaction, he had determined which meds I would be taking. The whole experience was so unbelievably ridiculous that the shock actually brought me back to reality enough to be like "fuck this shit I'm out." I was there voluntarily so I told them I was done. I resumed my shitty drunken life, and later tried to kill myself. But I never returned to one of those shitholes, and never intend to.

I can see that it can be helpful for someone who needs to be stabilized, which it has helped with in the past when I've been off my fucking rocker and balls deep in mania and/or psychotic. But that's about it I guess

 

[SinisterKid]

I relate so very very well Willow. One visit from a physio, asked why I used sticks to walk, watched me walk, said do these exercises, left. One guy came and asked if I would like to go to the gym. I said yes, never saw him again. One nurse asked if I played chess, we had one game, that was that. I never had one meal whilst I was there, no one bothered to ask why. I saw the head doc once and he just stopped all my meds. So apart from those very brief interactions, I spent 5 days in a room by myself. At night, I locked my door only for the night staff to leave it open because they thought I was asleep. Needless to say every hour I was up locking the door again. I had nothing with me, no phone, no laptop, no clothes, nothing, not even a book. No one asked if I needed anything. No one told me that because I was voluntary, I could leave the ward anytime I pleased.

The best thing I ever did was to walk out of that place.

 

[stbdchick]

I made the mistake of voluntarily hospitalizing myself a few decades back.

During intake, they explained to me that from *this* moment, even before I was admitted, they could hold me for 72 hours until a judge determined competency.

To me, what that meant was, I had to lie to get out of there. So the very first antidepressant they gave me worked miraculously!

There were a number of really stressed folks in there, and some flatout whackos. There was one woman who I became friends with; together we pretty much mothered the rest of the group. Given that I was at my wit's end to have even considered hospitalizing myself, the stress made me crazy.

I'd have been better off in a hotel with a pile of books for a week, but insurance doesn't cover that.

I later found a therapist that worked for me; he specialized in trauma. During the first get-to-know-you visit, I asked him what his reaction would be if I were suicidal. He said unless he thought I was going to do it immediately, he would not hospitalize me. I figured... if I couldn't be honest, why bother with therapy at all? He kept to his word.

Hospitals are useless, frankly, often even for physical problems.

 

[Cloudy]

I was there for three days after my second attempt and it was horrendous because my roommate had gotten a concussion before coming in and she was in severe pain, but the nurses wouldn't do anything about it. She had both her eyes black and her hair was matted with crusty old blood and she kept shouting and asking me to go and get the nurses to give her painkillers. They wouldn't listen to me nor her and it was very frustrating.

 

[onlyinsleep]

I spent 3 months in a psych ward. Almost kept me from graduating HS (was a big deal for me b/c I was a few grades ahead). I had to fake family reconciliation to get out. They made me go home on weekends and return to hospital during weekdays for at least a month like some kind of dumb work release jail program. I faked playing Connect 4 and stupid ass card games with parents to get out. WTF

I got out a week before midterms and had to cram down 3 months of classwork to graduate on time. I passed them all and graduated what a nightmare.

As a result my parents wouldnt allow me to go away to college. All that work busting my ass to pass midterms was for nothing! What a$$holes!

Was kicked out of my home a few months later. I never returned and became more successful than anyone in my family. F*CK THEM!


I hear you. While I was in me and a bunch of other girls in the psych ward staged an uprising to protest how patients were being treated. We ran the halls screaming throwing shit down on the floor in the hallways. They tranquilized us all and put us in straight jackets. I have claustrophobia so being restrained was like a brush with death for me.

I'd rather CTB than ever be in a state hospital again.

They still use straight jackets?! God that is barbaric. We've gone nowhere fast.

 

[hello123]

I have mentioned it in my post on why you wanna cbt thread. Noone should be able to lock and and to not even mention DRUG people involuntarily if they hadnt commited a crime. Although my last visit was sort of voluntary. If you commited a crime serve the sentence for your crime. No one should decide what to do with you medically if you had not asked for it.

 

[bigj75]

i heard they just dope you up with stuff so you become a zombie and lay there pretty much.

 

[Ruffian]

I had an acquaintance who served in the Vietnam War. Not sure about the exact sequence of events but i remember he had married a woman from Laos, and shortly after this, his wife was killed from the bombings of Laos by US forces. Basically he went into a mental breakdown and had to be hospitalized. Imagine that: your own wife killed by your own comrades in arms.

He felt so broken and desperate to end his life; so he charged at the reinforced glass of his hospital room, shattered it, and fell maybe 2-3 stories.

Unfortunately he survived to tell the tale.

That's horrible. I used to teach English to Cambodian and Loatian refugees. Not a lot of people realize what those 2 counties have been through, and I"m sad to hear yet another sad story from the fallout.

 

[hello123]

I have gottenmyself locked up unnecessarily several times because of me not going thru fully with moving out of my stupid and also vicious and wonderful moms apartment. Someone who is that stupif does not get to decide if someone is insane is not. But she is so nonchalant with her aggresive accusations that if you happen to have any shred of doubt in yourself on top of that you just start to believe it. And also my fascination with insanity. You just don't stay living with someone like that you find a way to move out asap if you dont want to be drugged out and traumatized for life by your experiences in a mental asylim. But i didnt know that it was actuslly going to happen. When talked to a private unbiased doctor i was told that its horseshit and i was made to doubt my sanity and that i should move out asap. Meanwhile the doctor gave me a diagnosis of schizophrenia based of what she told them. At the same time nurses were telling me to get out of that living arrangement if you dont want to be hospitalized and stuff.

I dont know if im making sense i have been rendered stupid as of november