Impulse or Painstaking Planning?

[BagofBones]

When do you contemplate the most?

And if/when you decide to CTB, do you think it will be an impulse moment or a moment that was planned over and over?


Personally, I've been told that people dont like logic in conversation so apparently having an exit strategy is "dark" and "selfish" instead of good preparation for every outcome...that said, I have plans, but the two attempts I've made were impulsive. Which is probably why they failed..

Does anyone else feel this?

 

[IMALB]

Planning is necessary - the body fights death. I plan - it's my own life ... not selfish.

 

[tomz323]

I contemplate 24/7, my brain never shuts the fuck up about killing myself. And I have been planing, but that's just me. I don't want to get it wrong.

 

[not_a_robot]

My whole life has been spent painstakingly planning. I'm just waiting for the impulse to finally carry me over the edge. But it may just be the decrepitude of old age that makes me go.

And you are right. Petty emotions are more important in our society than logic. One of the best reasons to CTB!

 

[Kringle's Curse]

I know I need to plan better. My last 2 attempts failed, obviously.

 

[Rocksandsand]

I plan continuously. It usually takes circumstances to push me into a sustained low mood (of weeks) to get me to a point of acting on the plan, but the planning is always running in the background.

For instance, I purchased SN two nights ago when I really really wanted out and I have had meto for months (I have it prescribed for nausea anyway). However, if I had it in my possession now, right at this moment, I wouldn't use it because the timing isn't right. There's still more planning to be done around logistics - scheduled message for someone to call the emergency services after I am dead; someone to look after my dog; funeral costs. So I guess it's all meticulously planned for me...

 

[BagofBones]

Planning is necessary - the body fights death. I plan - it's my own life ... not selfish.

I agree that it's not selfish at all. I am as 'pro-choice' as it becomes.

I always have perfect plans and then before that planned date I impulsively act.

I contemplate 24/7, my brain never shuts the fuck up about killing myself. And I have been planing, but that's just me. I don't want to get it wrong.

I feel you! I think about suicide absolutely every day. My will power is about as strong as my attention span ;P

My whole life has been spent painstakingly planning. I'm just waiting for the impulse to finally carry me over the edge. But it may just be the decrepitude of old age that makes me go.

And you are right. Petty emotions are more important in our society than logic. One of the best reasons to CTB!

It gets so hard to understand social nuances!

I know I need to plan better. My last 2 attempts failed, obviously.

Do you think you failed because it was an impulse action? My plans seem like they would be foolproof..and then I get one ingredient and run.. Maybe its impatience?

I plan continuously. It usually takes circumstances to push me into a sustained low mood (of weeks) to get me to a point of acting on the plan, but the planning is always running in the background.

For instance, I purchased SN two nights ago when I really really wanted out and I have had meto for months (I have it prescribed for nausea anyway). However, if I had it in my possession now, right at this moment, I wouldn't use it because the timing isn't right. There's still more planning to be done around logistics - scheduled message for someone to call the emergency services after I am dead; someone to look after my dog; funeral costs. So I guess it's all meticulously planned for me...

That makes absolute sense to me. I have had a large stock of 1;4 B for a bit..It honestly has made me feel better to have that it my apartment..just in case..

 

[Kringle's Curse]

Do you think you failed because it was an impulse action? My plans seem like they would be foolproof..and then I get one ingredient and run.. Maybe its impatience?

Yeah definitely an impulse action. I was drunk both times.

 

[BagofBones]

Yeah definitely an impulse action. I was drunk both times.

Ah, my main vice as well. Though both times it was drunk + high. My plans are meticulous, my drunk is sloppy. ;P

 

[Letmego. Please]

When i was a nipper & had a drink problem doing things on impulse was standard.

Now im way too old & i plan, plan & then plan some more, can have 3/4 methods planned, but hell yeah as the saying goes "Piss poor planning = Piss poor success.

 

[letmeseethedeath]

My whole life has been spent painstakingly planning. I'm just waiting for the impulse to finally carry me over the edge. But it may just be the decrepitude of old age that makes me go.

And you are right. Petty emotions are more important in our society than logic. One of the best reasons to CTB!

same

 

[deathenvoy]

I think both is needed. Choose method carefully, order needed supplies, make them easily accessible and than wait for impulse which will override SI.

 

[ExitTheDay]

Definitely a moment that was planned over and over, but usually when I pick the day to do it everything seems so drawn-out and I stop myself. I also don't see why people think its selfish, we all weren't asked to be on this earth so that should be our decision to leave or not whether it be from natural causes or CTBing

 

[ArtsyDrawer]

I'm more leaning towards the plan camp, although my plan got unexpectedly pushed between two and five years forward.
I'm trying to give this life thing a chance after a scary good few hours in the hospital, of all places.
It could, hypothetically, work.
Very very hypothetically.
I'm gambling on a very small... thing... here.
It could, however, also be an impulse thing since I will definitely lose my shit should the gamble fail.
Two gambles, actually.

 

[Vegrau]

When do you contemplate the most?

And if/when you decide to CTB, do you think it will be an impulse moment or a moment that was planned over and over?


Personally, I've been told that people dont like logic in conversation so apparently having an exit strategy is "dark" and "selfish" instead of good preparation for every outcome...that said, I have plans, but the two attempts I've made were impulsive. Which is probably why they failed..

Does anyone else feel this?

I planned this for 10 years. Waiting for that chance. Not making any friends. Distancing myself from everyone. Severing all the ties. As to lessen the pain for the people around when I finally done it. Yet at the same time doing whatever I want. Enjoying this life as I see fit. If I am going to die why not play until I am tired of it? I knew my path. I knew how it will end.

 

[riverstyx]

For me it would be painstakingly planning.

No room for error in my book when it comes to something as serious as CTB.

 

[tomz323]

For me it would be painstakingly planning.

No room for error in my book when it comes to something as serious as CTB.

Same, what is it only 1 in 17 people end up successful after attempting to ctb? I intend to be that 1 in 17.

 

[TAW122]

I will most likely be planning my death when the time comes. I don't want to do it without planning as that increases the chance of failure. There is a risk that the survival instinct may kick in and screw up my preparations, but that is always a given risk. However, with adequate planning and calm, I am confident that I will be able to overcome SI and also succeed in CTB'ing.

 

[Mn1245]

I'm planning too. I tried with no planning to hang my self but it was too painful. Then I started to look into CO or N but I will go with N as it's easier to get the supplies and prepare.

 

[PatKat]

Which else comes first I guess. I have had both impulsive attempt - car into wall impulse at 75mph, and 2 planned PS. I am just that unlucky that I cant leave even. :(

 

[andy69]

Does planning to commit suicide make it less likely to happen? If a person delays and puts a lot of thought into his or her action, does it allow for a change of heart/mind?

I am planning to end my life before I turn fifty. But I am wondering if I delay it, I might not do it.

 

[Faraway1990]

I have planned it I have a time limit too. I have made peace with it.

 

[LMFAO FOCKERS]

Does planning to commit suicide make it less likely to happen? If a person delays and puts a lot of thought into his or her action allow for a change of heart/mind?

I don't think there is one definitive answer to this question but the following tend to be true:

1. A person who is perpetually depressed and suicidal is often impulsive
2. A person who is depressed and becomes mildly better will tend to start planning suicide as soon as they improve due to having more energy.
3. A person who has been in situations 1. or 2. either uses CTB as comfort with the intent of completing suicide at some point in the future. (some never go forth)
4. A person who was just situationally depressed and not suffering from a chronic mental illness would likely never comprehend 1-3. because they make no distinction between a) situational depression v. chronic depression, or b) rational suicide v. impulse suicide

 

[PatKat]

I don't think there is one definitive answer to this question but the following tend to be true:

1. A person who is perpetually depressed and suicidal is often impulsive
2. A person who is depressed and becomes mildly better will tend to start planning suicide as soon as they improve due to having more energy.
3. A person who has been in situations 1. or 2. either uses CTB as comfort with the intent of completing suicide at some point in the future. (some never go forth)
4. A person who was just situationally depressed and not suffering from a chronic mental illness would likely never comprehend 1-3. because they make no distinction between a) situational depression v. chronic depression, or b) rational suicide v. impulse suicide

I dont remember where I read it, but it stated that even planned requires impulse to the act.

 

[LMFAO FOCKERS]

I dont remember where I read it, but it stated that even planned requires impulse to the act.

interesting probably true in some cases. I guess those times where SI kicks in you'd have to say "oh well F it!"

 

[PatKat]

interesting probably true in some cases. I guess those times where SI kicks in you'd have to say "oh well F it!"

I mean I have attempted 2 times that were planned and I dont remember any impulse. Then again I do have a TBI and O2 deprivation damage so maybe I dont remember?