Im tired of failing the people i love

[VolatilePotato]

I have BPD. My FP just left me for the 2nd time and went NC after briefly getting back together. For a brief moment, I had her in my life again and things were going back to normal. Now, she despises me and want nothing to do with me. I failed her. I fucked up. And in e again, I wanna die. I'm tired of destroying the people I care about. I've been drinking and I took some pills, but it'd be nice to talk to someone before I wake up tomorrow or don't. At this point idk what to expect anymore. I miss her. I miss taking to her every day. I'm just tired.

 

[theguineapigking]

Dude. I'm sorry for the crap you've been through. Suicide on impulse may not be the best thing to do. I know you've wanted to die for a long time. But recently things were a lot better for you, right? Is there any way you can repair what was damaged? Do you have any interest in trying?

I'm here to talk to you if you'd like man. I don't know what you took, but I sure hope everything goes in your favor.

Feel free to pm me

 

[VolatilePotato]

Dude. I'm sorry for the crap you've been through. Suicide on impulse may not be the best thing to do. I know you've wanted to die for a long time. But recently things were a lot better for you, right? Is there any way you can repair what was damaged? Do you have any interest in trying?

I'm here to talk to you if you'd like man. I don't know what you took, but I sure hope everything goes in your favor.

Feel free to pm me

Thanks, I appreciate that. I just dont want a life without her Andy hurts so much..

 

[randomz]

I know how you feel. Being left by the person you love could be devastatiin but as @theguineapigking said , you saw that things could be better right? Maybe there is a way to find someone to love and who will love you? It's hard I know but it's worth a try. Also, if you need anyone to talk to I am here, you can always PM me.

 

[theguineapigking]

Thanks, I appreciate that. I just dont want a life without her Andy hurts so much..

No problem at all man. I know it must hurt so badly. Sometimes, unfortunately, emotional scars in a relationship can take TIME to heal(hopefully possible in your case). Please consider this. I'm not saying suicide is wrong. There's no answer I can give you, as it is entirely up to you. But perhaps don't rush into anything.

I wish you the best. I'm here for you.

 

[VolatilePotato]

I know how you feel. Being left by the person you love could be devastatiin but as @theguineapigking said , you saw that things could be better right? Maybe there is a way to find someone to love and who will love you? It's hard I know but it's worth a try. Also, if you need anyone to talk to I am here, you can always PM me.

It's just torture..idk how to deal with it in this moment

 

[randomz]

It's just torture..idk how to deal with it in this moment

try to distract yourself, don't leave yourself in the pit of despair and depression. Do something for yourself - buy yourself something nice or pay attention to some of your hobbies.