I'm scared

[helloworld]

After finding this website I have had multiple failed attempts at trying to find the carotid because my method of choosing is partial hang. I had always just tried to partially hang from the doorknob, but today I actually tied a dress necktie and belt together and did the method where you throw the rope over the door. I leaned my head to the left a little and immediately felt like I was going to pass out. I finally found the sensation that I was looking for and was overcome with relief but also so much fear. I quickly loosened myself and now I just dont know how to feel. I want to die, but I have never been this close and the reality of it is just hitting me right now. I could literally be dead by tomorrow. I'm also scared that my rope that I made is gonna break and I will fail.
Welp, just went back to retest it and cannot feel the dizzy/about to pass out sensation anymore and I'm back to square 1 with the head exploding. Shoulda taken my chance when I had it.

 

[Notabadguy]

They say it's difficult to master partial hanging.

 

[mediocre]

From experience I can tell you it seems almost impossible. I have never gotten the relaxed feeling it has always been uncomfortable and felt like my head was going to explode.

 

[Notabadguy]

I suppose it also depends on your particular physical anatomy.

 

[autumnal]

Regarding the fear, don't pressure yourself to do anything before you are definitely ready. In my opinion, if you have to wonder about whether you are ready or not, then you aren't.

 

[Notabadguy]

Regarding the fear, don't pressure yourself to do anything before you are definitely ready. In my opinion, if you have to wonder about whether you are ready or not, then you aren't.

+1. Don't rush.

 

[theguineapigking]

Hey. Please be positive that you want to die before you practice. You can pass out without even realizing it sometimes. This is why people die playing the "choking game", which is basically deriving oxygen to the brain for pleasure(weird high feeling). People do accidentally pass out and die.


I will give you one hint: you're probably compressing the jugular veins(take blood from brain) and not the carotid arteries(take blood to brain). This causes pressure buildup in your head because the blood flows in but not out. The jugulars are on top of the carotids(at a weird angle I believe mostly covering the carotid). This means not enough pressure, which can be due to the angle or literally that you're not leaning into it enough..therefore not enough pressure is on the neck.



Now, have you exhausted all of your options? Have you talked to family members, friends, a therapist, etc? I really hope you're not rushing into suicide. I do ask of you to please consider deeply(taking the above into consideration..in this paragraph) if death is your best option(from your point of view). If you think about attempting, please be in a clear mindset when you make the decision to attempt. It's one thing to make a rash decision to go through with it if it's simply survival instinct that's holding you back, but it's another to rush into it filled with doubt.


We're here for you. Please talk to us if you need support. I'll do my best to respond if you need to talk at all!

Best wishes.

 

[helloworld]

If you think about attempting, please be in a clear mindset when you make the decision to attempt. It's one thing to make a rash decision to go through with it if it's simply survival instinct that's holding you back, but it's another to rush into it filled with doubt.

Thanks for the advice., I'm positive that I don't want to be here, but I was just shocked that I had actually correctly compressed my carotid artery. I had never been that close to success and didn't expect it at all and so my survival instinct definitely kicked in. I think the next time I feel the dizzy/passing out sensation, I won't be as shocked because I had already experienced it and know what is coming next. I had already attempted multiple times to partial hang, but I was really close to losing hope because I would compress the jugular instead. I think the fact that I have control over my own death just made me really excited because this was all I wanted during the past 8 years, but it was scary because of the fact that I had never been so close.

Now, have you exhausted all of your options? Have you talked to family members, friends, a therapist, etc? I really hope you're not rushing into suicide. I do ask of you to please consider deeply(taking the above into consideration..in this paragraph) if death is your best option(from your point of view). If you think about attempting, please be in a clear mindset when you make the decision to attempt. It's one thing to make a rash decision to go through with it if it's simply survival instinct that's holding you back, but it's another to rush into it filled with doubt.

I have, I've been feeling this way for a long time and had multiple failed attempts when I was younger trying to OD. I guess this experience has taught me more than anything that practice is important so you can choose when you want to go. Every time I "practiced" I went in with the notion that the best case scenario would be me dying. Probably not the right mindset because practice is to practice so you can choose to go when you want

From experience I can tell you it seems almost impossible. I have never gotten the relaxed feeling it has always been uncomfortable and felt like my head was going to explode.

Me too. Thats why I was so shocked and excited and scared when I finally got the relaxed feeling right.