I’m not sure how to go

[3cookies]

I want to die in a non painful way as I am in excruciating pain 24/7 already. One of my non curable diseases is CRPS aka the suicide disease. I constantly feel like I'm being burning alive from the inside out. It's the most painful disease in the world. As if that wasn't enough I have seizures, dystonia and Crohns as well. I am almost completely bedbound and have no quality of life. At 32 I know I cannot continue. I have some affairs to get in order but after that I'm done with this world and my body. I have several deep-like almost bone deep- wounds that are infected but instead of killing me they just increase my pain. In the long run infection might kill me but it's taking too long.
Anyways here is what I know:
I want a method that is painless or relatively painless
I don't want to OD on painkillers because I don't want the Dr that tried to help me have an opioid overdose on his record
I'd like it to look like I died in my sleep. Atleast upon first look. I don't want to traumatize my kids anymore than they will be by finding me with an obvious suicide.
I do have access to morphine (immediate release and extended), Valium, Xanax, zofran, sleeping pills, neurontin, dialantin, and muscle relaxers.
Also is there anyway for a younger but long term chronically ill person not to have an autopsy? Especially since I have several types of untreated infections?
Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I know I'm ready mentally & emotionally.

 

[sleepless]

Sorry I won't be able to answer your question. But I want to say I got quite emotional after I read this, my eyes got a little teary, I'm not sure why at this point, I've read a lot of content on this forum. My reasons wanting to CTB seems big in my world, but after being juxtaposed with yours, it makes mine seem so minute, and even guilty that I should consider wanting to put my life down. Sometimes, I fantasize about the possibility of giving my body to someone who is chronically ill, at least my death won't go to waste after my exit.

I can only imagine what you are going through, and in my opinion living everyday itself does make you a hero.

 

[3cookies]

Sorry I won't be able to answer your question. But I want to say I got quite emotional after I read this, my eyes got a little teary, I'm not sure why at this point, I've read a lot of content on this forum. My reasons wanting to CTB seems big in my world, but after being juxtaposed with yours, it makes mine seem so minute, and even guilty that I should consider wanting to put my life down. Sometimes, I fantasize about the possibility of giving my body to someone who is chronically ill, at least my death won't go to waste after my exit.

I can only imagine what you are going through, and in my opinion living everyday itself does make you a hero.

I don't ever think like that. No ones suffering is more important than another's. I feel like an idiot for staying so long

 

[SeekingSolace]

You are a very strong person...I did a little reading on your condition and was saddened by how much you have to sufffer on a daily basis. I don't have any advice on a painless way to go; I have been struggling with the same question myself. I hope you find peace.

 

[Sickman75]

I don't ever think like that. No ones suffering is more important than another's. I feel like an idiot for staying so long

@3cookies
This SN method seems to be one of the painless efforts people like around here. We think one lady passed away from it last night. You have to take some other pills to keep from purging but you fall asleep and you drift away into the next Galaxy.
Here is that thread. https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sn-tonight.11210/
Here is a bunch of info about SN
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sn-megathread.1156/

 

[3cookies]

@3cookies
This SN method seems to be one of the painless efforts people like around here. We think one lady passed away from it last night. You have to take some other pills to keep from purging but you fall asleep and you drift away into the next Galaxy.
Here is that thread. https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sn-tonight.11210/
Here is a bunch of info about SN
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sn-megathread.1156/

Thank you so much

 

[3cookies]

You are a very strong person...I did a little reading on your condition and was saddened by how much you have to sufffer on a daily basis. I don't have any advice on a painless way to go; I have been struggling with the same question myself. I hope you find peace.

Thank you! I wish more people knew such a horrific disease exists