OldGod
Student
- Feb 20, 2020
- 141
I'm going crazy with this. The past couple days I've been wondering how the future would be. The thing is this isn't the first time I've been in this position, longing for something with naive hope. It never happens. I'm in that position again now. There's so many things that tell me the future does not look hopeful and that more hurt is on the way but I also can't ignore the fact that I don't truly know what will happen. I've been going in circles with this. I really really don't want to suffer anymore and when I think about what's pushing me to this I can see why it won't change. There's logic behind this and there's past experiences to base it on. But then again you never really know. Dammit, my mind is a mess.
Sorry, I don't have any solid support systems and this post probably seems all over the place. I'm just trying to vent without being too specific because I'd rather not be judged for my reasons.
Everything is set to go down this Saturday. Obviously I can always back out but this would be an ideal time to do it.
Deep in my soul I want things to be different. I want to believe that the future will be good but I've fooled myself into thinking that before and have been hurt just the same. I feel like I'm going crazy here.
Sorry, I don't have any solid support systems and this post probably seems all over the place. I'm just trying to vent without being too specific because I'd rather not be judged for my reasons.
Everything is set to go down this Saturday. Obviously I can always back out but this would be an ideal time to do it.
Deep in my soul I want things to be different. I want to believe that the future will be good but I've fooled myself into thinking that before and have been hurt just the same. I feel like I'm going crazy here.