Venting I’m more willing to die after attempting

[joegoes100]

I've recently attempted suicide twice, both times were split decisions because I had an open opportunity, but I've been suicidal for months and planning for a while.
What's really bothering me is that currently I feel like I want to die more than when I've done both my attempts. Like when I was hanging, I didn't want to die as much as I do right now writing this. Is this normal?

 

[GodzillasBiggestFan]

i still seem to have problems with survival instinct, but i find myself thinking of dying more then before my attempts

 

[joegoes100]

i still seem to have problems with survival instinct, but i find myself thinking of dying more then before my attempts

Glad to know I'm not the only one who feels like this.

 

[soul2realm]

I failed my first attempt 4 months ago, but everyday my yearning to do it grows stronger than before. I guess to a certain extent it's the final hurdle.

 

[joegoes100]

I failed my first attempt 4 months ago, but everyday my yearning to do it grows stronger than before. I guess to a certain extent it's the final hurdle.

Never thought of it like that.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

I want to die, I just don't want to get frickin strangled by a frickin rope. My neck is tender to the touch and it hurts to swallow, I'm not exactly enthusiastic to do FSH for real.

 

[joegoes100]

If you do it right it should be painless and quick. I have a broken collarbone and struggled to successfully tie it on both ends, the second time I hesitated tho as I was hanging but I don't know if it would've worked anyway. First time it just didn't work and only left a mark