Venting I'm getting tired of "normies" saying life is easy and I'm being dramatic. CTB pls asap.

[A_Spartan_Dead]

I keep getting told how life isn't that hard, and how I can simply "move country, get a job, rent an apartment" and if I raise concerns then I'm "being dramatic or lazy". They don't seem to realise how hard it is to clear out a place that I've lived in for 30 years, get all the required documents ready (especially in the country move to), deal with the beauracracy of the taxation offices in both countries, then try to find an apartment and get a job that will cover expenses. Add to that a few other circumstances and my psychological issues... And the way the world is going: more expense more control more oppression more responsibility less rights...
How the hell then is it easy, or even want to live in this world?

 

[sanctionedusage]

moving overseas and starting from scratch is quite literally the most extreme decision you could make in life. anyone who says it's easy is 100% delusional, ridiculously privileged, or straight up making shit up lol

why else would 1st gen immigrant parents never shut up about it?

 

[Lamentice]

Gotta understand this is coming from the same disingenuous place as "friends" and people of your "support circle" parroting that you should see or talk to a therapist when you reach out to them. It's takes nothing from them to offer you this "advice", it's easy & delegates responsibility off of them. They're not giving you this "advice" because they've thoroughly thought it through or actually thinks it's something you're gonna do (or actually something they would even do), it's just empty phrases to offer when they don't want to do any emotional labor or meet you where you are, so they shirk you off with insincere quick-pull statements like these.

They don't actually think it's easy, because they don't actually think about it at all.

 

[sanctionedusage]

"friends" and people of your "support circle" parroting that you should see or talk to a therapist when you reach out to them. It's takes nothing from them to offer you this "advice", it's easy & delegates responsibility off of them.

dont forget rebranding this as "boundaries" and "self care." if you can't even offer some support when your friend's had a hard day at work, or some other mundane problem 90% of the people on this site still somehow receive no comfort for irl, without feeling emotionally taxed and troubled, you straight up shouldn't have friends. it's crazy how people think emotional labor and basic empathy is "a job for your therapist, not your friends" when actually, therapy is actively appropriating the exact same role of a friend but in the unhealthiest, most parasocial way possible.

 

[emptyshells]

Gotta understand this is coming from the same disingenuous place as "friends" and people of your "support circle" parroting that you should see or talk to a therapist when you reach out to them. It's takes nothing from them to offer you this "advice", it's easy & delegates responsibility off of them. They're not giving you this "advice" because they've thoroughly thought it through or actually thinks it's something you're gonna do (or actually something they would even do), it's just empty phrases to offer when they don't want to do any emotional labor or meet you where you are, so they shirk you off with insincere quick-pull statements like these.

They don't actually think it's easy, because they don't actually think about it at all.

Completely. Well said.

I keep getting told how life isn't that hard, and how I can simply "move country, get a job, rent an apartment" and if I raise concerns then I'm "being dramatic or lazy". They don't seem to realise how hard it is to clear out a place that I've lived in for 30 years, get all the required documents ready (especially in the country move to), deal with the beauracracy of the taxation offices in both countries, then try to find an apartment and get a job that will cover expenses. Add to that a few other circumstances and my psychological issues... And the way the world is going: more expense more control more oppression more responsibility less rights...
How the hell then is it easy, or even want to live in this world?

I can relate. I desperately want to move, but where?! Everywhere is dangerous for me. And it wouldn't change me. And the work that goes into it! It truly is uprooting your whole life. People who treat it as easy should be treated as idiots.

 

[Lamentice]

dont forget rebranding this as "boundaries" and "self care." if you can't even offer some support when your friend's had a hard day at work, or some other mundane problem 90% of the people on this site still somehow receive no comfort for irl, without feeling emotionally taxed and troubled, you straight up shouldn't have friends. it's crazy how people think emotional labor and basic empathy is "a job for your therapist, not your friends" when actually, therapy is actively appropriating the exact same role of a friend but in the unhealthiest, most parasocial way possible.

Preach! I'll die on the hill that I am just as responsible for the people I have chosen to love and have with me as they are for themselves--which is just community.

 

[fallingbehind]

Im going to be honest, anyone that says "move!" as if thats going to change your personality have no idea what theyre saying. I wont speak on any other coping mechanisms you mentioned, but as an international student every aspect of my life became 100× worse when I moved. Not saying if you had the option it would be the same for you or anyone else, but just giving my 2 cents.

 

[A_Spartan_Dead]

And I'm in this ridiculous situation where if I stay in Australia I'm gonna be homeless, if I go to Greece I'm probably gonna end up without a job there too and homeless again, and have spent every last dollar to get there... yet family members tell me that it's gonna be "not hard at all" and "no you shouldn't want to ctb, you're being dramatic, stupid, cowardly, weak and lazy"

moving overseas and starting from scratch is quite literally the most extreme decision you could make in life. anyone who says it's easy is 100% delusional, ridiculously privileged, or straight up making shit up lol

why else would 1st gen immigrant parents never shut up about it?