Archness
Defective Personel
- Jan 20, 2023
- 577
All moments are fleeting. Work is an alright change of pace, as minor as my internship is.
The amounts of times I've said "fine" is just annoying, with all those moments people asking and making me repeat that again and again aswel.
While I'm capable of working, my autism still limits me and I could never integrate with others as naturally as those "coworkers". When it comes to the work itself, I got nothing to complain about, I'm not constantly bothered, I'm not always stressed or strained. It's a good break from outright rotting, heh, a distraction from my distractions you could say. Though at the back of my mind I know this break from the boredom of neet life, will just become monotony of adult life. At least it's not in a room all day on the computer.
All in all, pretty close to what I expected before, posting something abt this thing. A "distraction from my distractions", I said that before. Life's unpredictable, but you can also know exactly what's coming. This firsthand taste of what's to come shows that I can deal with work, I just hate paper/computer work. Becoming more depressed/suicidal rotting at an office would outweigh any economic benefit it's supposedly give me with it being easier. Maybe that's why more school's a no-go for me.
Also, modern life, I don't like it. Entierly computers, paperwork, talking, social, etc.
Right now I'm fine, but as always, just waiting for things to get worse; excuse to ctb.
I'm kinda sorry about whining and making all these personal posts. I don't have any social medias or irl ppl to talk to, Sorry also for clogging up the suicide discussions with these posts. I dunno, feel like ppl are keeping silent to be curtious while judging and secretly disliking me.
Im just tired and in the usual over-thinking mood before bed.
The amounts of times I've said "fine" is just annoying, with all those moments people asking and making me repeat that again and again aswel.
While I'm capable of working, my autism still limits me and I could never integrate with others as naturally as those "coworkers". When it comes to the work itself, I got nothing to complain about, I'm not constantly bothered, I'm not always stressed or strained. It's a good break from outright rotting, heh, a distraction from my distractions you could say. Though at the back of my mind I know this break from the boredom of neet life, will just become monotony of adult life. At least it's not in a room all day on the computer.
All in all, pretty close to what I expected before, posting something abt this thing. A "distraction from my distractions", I said that before. Life's unpredictable, but you can also know exactly what's coming. This firsthand taste of what's to come shows that I can deal with work, I just hate paper/computer work. Becoming more depressed/suicidal rotting at an office would outweigh any economic benefit it's supposedly give me with it being easier. Maybe that's why more school's a no-go for me.
Also, modern life, I don't like it. Entierly computers, paperwork, talking, social, etc.
Right now I'm fine, but as always, just waiting for things to get worse; excuse to ctb.
I'm kinda sorry about whining and making all these personal posts. I don't have any social medias or irl ppl to talk to, Sorry also for clogging up the suicide discussions with these posts. I dunno, feel like ppl are keeping silent to be curtious while judging and secretly disliking me.
Im just tired and in the usual over-thinking mood before bed.
