Venting I'm afraid of myself

[Zer0]

It is starting to feel OK not trying anymore. I have no remorse/guilty when someone i've just met tries to be my friend and i put no effort into it. I know it is wrong but i just know at some point that possible relationship will fail so why not avoid it?

 

[Jean4]

It is starting to feel OK not trying anymore. I have no remorse/guilty when someone i've just met tries to be my friend and i put no effort into it. I know it is wrong but i just know at some point that possible relationship will fail so why not avoid it?

We're you diagnosed as being Bipolar of Depressed? It sounds like it.

 

[Zer0]

We're you diagnosed as being Bipolar of Depressed? It sounds like it.

Actually i've never been to any mental health especialist but depressed sounds really close to it.

 

[Carina]

Actually i've never been to any mental health especialist but depressed sounds really close to it.

Are you able to go to a mental health person where you are? They could possibly help if you've never been to one, never had meds, etc.

 

[Zer0]

Are you able to go to a mental health person where you are? They could possibly help if you've never been to one, never had meds, etc.

I could, but idk why every time i think about it i something in my mind just makes it sound like a stupid idea. Maybe someday i can overcome that feeling.

 

[Carina]

I could, but idk why every time i think about it i something in my mind just makes it sound like a stupid idea. Maybe someday i can overcome that feeling.

Stupid how? Curious really :)


I've known some who thought it was just going to be a waste of time when they had others to talk to before--but wasn't sure how you viewed it.

Granted maybe thinking of them as just another doctor, that has meds, that might be able to help might be able to help. Assuming you like other doctor types!

 

[Zer0]

Stupid how? Curious really :)


I've known some who thought it was just going to be a waste of time when they had others to talk to before--but wasn't sure how you viewed it.

Granted maybe thinking of them as just another doctor, that has meds, that might be able to help might be able to help. Assuming you like other doctor types!

Idk, it just makes me feel dumb, like someone is making fun of me.

I don't really like doctors in general, i avoid them until i'm really sick. And i don't intent to live based in meds, to me if my happiness depends on meds then i'd rather live the way i live now.

 

[Carina]

Idk, it just makes me feel dumb, like someone is making fun of me.

I don't really like doctors in general, i avoid them until i'm really sick. And i don't intent to live based in meds, to me if my happiness depends on meds then i'd rather live the way i live now.

One thing with mental health professionals--they've basically seen or heard it all. They won't be making fun of you. I mean I get the feeling like people are making fun of you (really when I go into a store I swear everyone is watching me because they know something is wrong with me)--but are they? Highly unlikely anyone even notices me beyond a glance.

But living off of meds... sometimes you don't need them forever. Sometimes meds just give a little boost that you need for a while, and you don't need them anymore. Sometimes you need them longer. You never know.

It's like now. you may feel one way toward things (meds) but if medicated, you might even think that you may be better on them.

Totally up to you of course :) But just mentioning so you don't avoid them out of thinking it is a definite permanent thing.

 

[Zer0]

One thing with mental health professionals--they've basically seen or heard it all. They won't be making fun of you. I mean I get the feeling like people are making fun of you (really when I go into a store I swear everyone is watching me because they know something is wrong with me)--but are they? Highly unlikely anyone even notices me beyond a glance.

But living off of meds... sometimes you don't need them forever. Sometimes meds just give a little boost that you need for a while, and you don't need them anymore. Sometimes you need them longer. You never know.

It's like now. you may feel one way toward things (meds) but if medicated, you might even think that you may be better on them.

Totally up to you of course :) But just mentioning so you don't avoid them out of thinking it is a definite permanent thing.

I kinda know if i do all that you said will 99% improve my life, but the negative feelings are stronger than any rationality. Before i go see a dorctor and start taking meds i have to find a way to step over that feeling, i swear i'm trying to find a way but it feels like there is no way because i'm the kind of person who(whom?) will live like that forever.