currently about to cry myself to sleep. im laying next to a person who barely wants me. or wants me at all. i keep trying to hold on to them & force things because im lonely & i love them. i let ppl treat me like shit just because i want someone around. im ok when im alone but i still sometimes just want a person. i just want love sometimes. i use sex sometimes to cope. thats the only thing guys want from me so i give it up until they're tired of that too. im fucking miserable. a miserable stupid girl. i have many reasons to wanna ctb but yet i try holding on & for what? if i dont ctb this year im going to just continue rotting slowly. ik i might regret posting this later knowing i cant delete it. i regret damn near everything in life. because im so stupid. im just typing at this point because once again, im just lonely. im going to die alone.
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