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nevergoodenough91

nevergoodenough91

Really trying to discover what is going on
Jun 20, 2023
74
"Loving family" "better than other families"

Enmeshed, abusive, controlling, manipulating, tyrannical, no sense of self allowed, no freedom, fear based mind control tactics, theyre always right, any wrong they are painstakingly backed into a corner on is excused like nothing, guilt tripping, you need to be exactly like I need you to be, harshness is mean, self defense is mean, you cant have what you want youre bad for that, youre greedy, youre lazy if you arent working on something all the time, your bad if you arent anxious about something "important" all the time.

Are you thinking about school now? Are you thinking about all these things you need to do? How about I watch every move you make when im in your presense and commentate on mistakes you make? While im at it ill correct you and pressure you if you say the wrong thing to me that I dont like. What if I never help you in life or teach you how to do work, then call you lazy when you fail and cannot manage anything? Then when youre stressed and trying to relax, ill make sure to remind you that you have all these things to do. What? You say you cant do it? Nonsense of course you can you just need to stop being so lazy like you are right now. Youre just in elementary school but youre a big boy you can have all the responsibilities and expectations an adult does, carry yourself like that so I dont have to work as hard to deal with you.

What if I never get involved in your life in a positive way because those things you like dont interest me? What if any sense of self expression is laughed at like its embarassing that youre acting any differently than me. What if I make your enviornment and development as a child deprived of anything stimulating at all because im too lazy and bored to take care of a child. Can you just be funny for mom and dad? Can you entertain us? Can you validate us? Can you be the thing we blame for our own problems? Can you tell me you love me? You know I had you for a reason right? For myself.
 
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