I'll be gone in about 4-5 hours, full suspension + exit bag. Could use a little feedback/advice.

[MachinaArcana]

Right before hanging myself, in about 4-5 hours, I'm going to ingest some tranquillizers / sleeping pills and then within seconds tape a bag over my head, just to be sure.

Over the past months I have been hoarding the following medication, I have several boxes of each of the following tablets:

Trazodone Chlorhydrate 100mg
Alprazolam (Xanax) 0,50 mg
Dagalfan Codeine 500mg paracetamol + 30 mg codeine heihydrate phosphate
Staurodorm (flurazepam) 27,42 mg


I have gin and bourbon, too :)

I'd just like to minimize the (undoubtedly) painful effects of full suspension, suppress the SI that will kick in, and be kind of drowsy when I make the drop.
Any suggestions as to what I should ingest, at that point?

Thank you.

P.S. I'm busy doing a lot of stuff right now (cleaning the appartement and so on, writing some messages) but will try to check answers regularly.

Thank you so much for making things easier. This is a fantastic community and I love you all.

-Christophe

 

[Alec]

Christophe(what a great and beautiful name btw) I wish I could help you with what to take but honestly I don't know any of the medication you named because well I don't know anything about medication at all whatsoever. I couldn't even read the names right I'm sure.
I just want to say, full suspension is fucking terrifying to me and I can't even imagine the pain that will come with it, I hope the pills and the alcohol will help
but most of all I want to say that I'm sorry, I'm so sorry you find yourself in a situation where you feel this is something you have to do and go through with it, I'm so sorry!! I realize that my sorry won't help and won't change a thing about the reasons you have but still I want you to know that I'm sorry you are in this pain and the only way is to go in such a painful way, you don't deserve more pain and I'm so sorry!!! Have you considered other prions? The ones that might not be as painful, like SN or N? Probably stupid question you probably have considered them but still I thought it's worth it to mention them.
I suppose all I can say is that I'm with you, I'm thinking about you and I'm keeping you in my thoughts I promise!!! When you are in pain today and in fear please know I'm thinking about you you are on my mind and I'm keeping you close to me, I'm with you!!!
I knew a person who as far as I know left us by doing full suspension(well I know it was hanging but I'm not 100% sure it was full suspension thought I'm pretty sure probably like 99% sure it was full suspension) and somehow I think he(that person I'm talking about) would want you to know that he went by the same way you are choosing, maybe it will make you feel less lonely I hope so!! Please please please STAY STRONG!!! You are amazing and I love you forever and ever!!!❤

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Please forgive me, I do not in any way mean to offend. I am direct and honest, and for me that is an expression of my caring and compassion.

Whenever I see a post like this that says, "I'm going to do this almost immediately, so please respond immediately," it tells me that:

1. The OP is trying to convince others to take on their own sense of urgency and changes of success rather than take personal responsibility for those things.

2. There has been little to no advance planning and research, which leads to a likelihood of backing out at best, or failure at worst. Backing out in such a case is in fact best, especially with the conscious understanding and acceptance that for now, it is best. The OP in such a case is not ready, and we cannot make it so.

Do you get what I'm saying?

If yes, I suggest taking some time to chill. Deal with the urgency, not what it's pushing you to do. Chat with folks here.

Then in a day or two, start researching for yourself the answers to your questions. There are resources here for checking drug interactions. Try putting a bag on your head just to see what it feels like. Take time to work out all of the details of writing messages, of what will happen and what you will do if you survive an attempt.

If you still find you need to withdraw from life, I suggest you do it with reflection and planning, not freaking out and rushing. Freaking out and rushing is likely to end up in still being alive and being in a bigger mess than the one you're trying to leave.

 

[breachingthevoid]

First, I'm so sorry this has come to this for you. I know you've probably already considered everything, but I wanted to say again that you can always stop and rethink things at any point. There is a lot of beauty in this world despite all of the pain and other negative things. Full suspension is terrifying to me. The only issues that I can think of with the medications that you mentioned is taking too much of anything and mixing, especially with alcohol, and getting sick. That's going to cause you a lot more undue pain. Obviously Xanax is your "anxiety" medication, and Codiene is going to be your pain reliever. I would keep things as simple as possible, and if you decide to stop at any point you can. Thinking about you...it's heartbreaking thinking about someone going through this, even though I know we've all thought about it. There are a lot of people here for you to talk to so reach out.

 

[jgm63]

In terms of hanging, this thread may have some good info :

Spoiler: hanging-comfortably

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/hanging-comfortably.28034/

There is also this one :

Spoiler: how-to-hang-yourself-improved-information

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/how-to-hang-yourself-improved-information.24972/

Remember, you can always change your mind if you wish.....

 

[LittleJem]

I think full suspension will be quick. The pills and bag might reduce your chances of success. Not sure, but maybe. For example, how long do those pills take to kick in? Will they kick in that quickly?

I know for me, if and when I CTB, I might find it easier on Ketamine, as it would put me in a slightly altered state. Cocaine apparently can help ctb.

You might be better off just with booze? I'm no expert, just my two pennies worth.

I wish you a peaceful journey.

 

[MachinaArcana]

Please forgive me, I do not in any way mean to offend. I am direct and honest, and for me that is an expression of my caring and compassion.

Whenever I see a post like this that says, "I'm going to do this almost immediately, so please respond immediately," it tells me that:

1. The OP is trying to convince others to take on their own sense of urgency and changes of success rather than take personal responsibility for those things.

2. There has been little to no advance planning and research, which leads to a likelihood of backing out at best, or failure at worst. Backing out in such a case is in fact best, especially with the conscious understanding and acceptance that for now, it is best. The OP in such a case is not ready, and we cannot make it so.

Do you get what I'm saying?

If yes, I suggest taking some time to chill. Deal with the urgency, not what it's pushing you to do. Chat with folks here.

Then in a day or two, start researching for yourself the answers to your questions. There are resources here for checking drug interactions. Try putting a bag on your head just to see what it feels like. Take time to work out all of the details of writing messages, of what will happen and what you will do if you survive an attempt.

If you still find you need to withdraw from life, I suggest you do it with reflection and planning, not freaking out and rushing. Freaking out and rushing is likely to end up in still being alive and being in a bigger mess than the one you're trying to leave.

I'm not freaking out and rushing at all, this has been well prepared. I'm just not an expert on medication. I am 48 and attempted ctb for the first time at age 23. What kept me from going through with it was not wanting to hurt my (in the meantime ex-) wife. But I'm divorced now, and at least there's some distance between us. Even though I know this will hurt her tremendously, I'm going through with this.

 

[LittleJem]

I'm not freaking out and rushing at all, this has been well prepared. I'm just not an expert on medication. I am 48 and attempted ctb for the first time at age 23. What kept me from going through with it was not wanting to hurt my (in the meantime ex-) wife. But I'm divorced now, and at least there's some distance between us. Even though I know this will hurt her tremendously, I'm going through with this.

I wish you luck and success. If that is permitted. I know what it is like to withdraw and create distance, so we hurt others less when we choose to end our suffering. I hope you find great peace.

 

[Jean4]

Is there anything we can do for you? Anything you want to talk about?

 

[MachinaArcana]

Is there anything we can do for you? Anything you want to talk about?

Yeah, sure. Let"s talk about music. Songs you can relate to, or even make you burst into tears. In my case it's Nine Inch Nails "Hurt", and the numerous wonderful cover versions of that song.

I have a long history of self harm.


Youn Sun Nah


Johnny Cash


Nine Inch Nails


Reznor/Bowie:


Reznor Solo:


Whitacre:


..so, which ones do you like best?

 

[Jean4]

Yeah, sure. Let"s talk about music. Songs you can relate to, or even make you burst into tears. In my case it's Nine Inch Nails "Hurt", and the numerous wonderful cover versions of that song.

I have a long history of self harm.


Youn Sun Nah


Johnny Cash


Nine Inch Nails


Reznor/Bowie:


Reznor Solo:


Whitacre:


..so, which ones do you like best?

 

[MachinaArcana]

I was at the Whitacre recording this clip is taken from, incidentally :)
He writes phenomenal choral music.

 

[Jean4]

Are you a musician?

 

[MachinaArcana]

Getting the required materials out... if anyone else cares to give some advice on the meds, I'd tremendously appreciate it.

 

[Jean4]

Getting the required materials out... if anyone else cares to give some advice on the meds, I'd tremendously appreciate it.

View attachment 28726

I'm here with you.

 

[Nem]

I hope you have an anxiety free time regardless of your decision
Peace/hugs

 

[Whitewash11235814]

Please forgive me, I do not in any way mean to offend. I am direct and honest, and for me that is an expression of my caring and compassion.

Whenever I see a post like this that says, "I'm going to do this almost immediately, so please respond immediately," it tells me that:

1. The OP is trying to convince others to take on their own sense of urgency and changes of success rather than take personal responsibility for those things.

2. There has been little to no advance planning and research, which leads to a likelihood of backing out at best, or failure at worst. Backing out in such a case is in fact best, especially with the conscious understanding and acceptance that for now, it is best. The OP in such a case is not ready, and we cannot make it so.

Do you get what I'm saying?

If yes, I suggest taking some time to chill. Deal with the urgency, not what it's pushing you to do. Chat with folks here.

Then in a day or two, start researching for yourself the answers to your questions. There are resources here for checking drug interactions. Try putting a bag on your head just to see what it feels like. Take time to work out all of the details of writing messages, of what will happen and what you will do if you survive an attempt.

If you still find you need to withdraw from life, I suggest you do it with reflection and planning, not freaking out and rushing. Freaking out and rushing is likely to end up in still being alive and being in a bigger mess than the one you're trying to leave.

I don't get it. It sounds like he's been preparing for this for a long time now. He said he hoarded a bunch of meds for this specific purpose, so it doesn't seem all that rushed to me. Sometimes the time just feels right.

 

[LastRide]

Ok I know all these meds, but if you want my honest opinion....take the Xanax (3-4 pills) and the Dafalgan Codeine (2-3 pills), and A LOT of alcohol....this will not help with the ctb but getting you past the SI kicking in and make you feel more relaxed....you don't want ot be out of it while doing it since you need some concentration to get it right. I imagine you have read about the method and you are well informed how it works. Just do enough meds and alcohol so you are calm, but let them not cloud your mind. I wish you a very safe passage, please take a very solid anchor point, I failed because of that 20 years ago ! If you wish to talk, I'm here and I send out my love

 

[Jean4]

Ok I know all these meds, but if you want my honest opinion....take the Xanax (3-4 pills) and the Dafalgan Codeine (2-3 pills), and A LOT of alcohol....this will not help with the ctb but getting you past the SI kicking in and make you feel more relaxed....you don't want ot be out of it while doing it since you need some concentration to get it right. I imagine you have read about the method and you are well informed how it works. Just do enough meds and alcohol so you are calm, but let them not cloud your mind. I wish you a very safe passage, please take a very solid anchor point, I failed because of that 20 years ago ! If you wish to talk, I'm here and I send out my love

Thanks for helping.
Is there anything we can do for you?

 

[Proto]

Good luck man!

 

[PoisonedJuliet]

Even though I'm on a pm with you right now just wanted to say that you are so caring and kind towards others. I wish you so much peace and I will be with you through your journey. Sending you many hugs Christophe it's been lovely talking to you and I will make sure to keep listening to Kate Bush and Maria Callas

 

[Dear Flabby]

First of all, I am sorry that life has brought you here, but I respect your right tochoose.

My thoughts, fwtaw, is that taking all of the meds could lead to vomiting, with a bag over your head, making your last moments extremely uncomfortable.

I agree with @LastRide that the Xanax, codiene, and alcohol combination seems to be pharmaceutically appropriate. I haven't taken these at the same time, though:)

From my own experience, bourbon with gin would lead to instant vomiting, but these things vary individually.

Peace and hugs,
Flabs

 

[AlreadyGone]

Good luck and I hope you found peace.

 

[highlyvolatile]

I hope you found peace ♡ and good luck

 

[Alec]

I don't know if you are still with us but wherever you are I hope you are feeling ok and I want to give you the biggest hug ever!!!

 

[Jean4]

Last seen today at 6:00 am. Are you ok?

 

[PoisonedJuliet]

Last seen today at 6:00 am. Are you ok?

He didn't respond to my messages that I sent about nine hours ago.

 

[BillS]

Getting the required materials out... if anyone else cares to give some advice on the meds, I'd tremendously appreciate it.

View attachment 28726

I hope you have found peace.