if it comes to it, and not yet, I wanna share my CTB for research

[Blutsager]

Hello,

I have made several posts throughout the weeks, and some may have come to recognize me already.
I have a bag of SN in a shelf, waiting for the day I feel this apocalyptic nightmare that is unfolding in front of us reaches a point I can't take it anymore, and at that point I intend to fast for as long as I can, upwards to 48 hours or more, and then take the SN. I may have some paracetamol avaible at the time, which I would take an hour before, but since my mom is taking it lately, her head hurts... I may have none available by the time it comes to that. I am terrified of if it may be effective or not, but regardless, I will have faith, on you, who have testified time and time again of it's effectiveness, and go on with it. I wish I could have a second method at hand... I wish I had some N... But I can't come up with anything. Hanging perhaps, altrough I am somewhat afraid of it.

Regardless, going to my point: if it comes to that, seeing as it would be my end, I wanna do so on a videocall. Not gonna lie, partially to share my last moments with someone, to not be alone, but also, in hopes that those last moments may serve a scientific purpose of this community. To be yet another testimony of the peacefulness and the effectiveness of SN.

I wanted to know if there is anyone here who handles such procedures. If this is something moderators in this server, or perhaps members of other pro-choice organizations present here, would be intersted into.
I want to insist, to not be called a liar, I have no intention of doing this yet. At this point, I am standing idle, waiting for seeing how things will unfold, but in my worst thoughts, in my imaginations of the worse possible scenarios... should they happen, I will absolutely do it.
I am just a man who likes to prepare. I am mentally perparing myself to do it if comes to that. And also, wanna prepare for doing this videocall, cause I don't know how complicated may it be to get in contact with the kind of people who could make the most of this research opportunity, and I can't tell how long may it take to get in contact with them or something, so might as well set it up now! And to remind everyone that this isn't certain, and I may end up deciding not to do. I don't wanna waste anyone's time nor dissapoint.

Thank you, honestly, for all your work in this community, and for what you have done to make this place what it is.

 

[RedDEE]

You don't have to share your suicide with us via videochat to give us good information about the effectiveness of SN. Science is an incredible thing, we can learn just as much from a lack of information as we can from information.

For example, if you tell us that you are going to take SN tonight, and we never see you make another post again, we can scientifically deduce that it was successful for you. However, if you tell us that you're going to take SN and then a week later you make a post that said it failed and you're in the hospital, that will give us equally important information about the effectiveness of SN.

In the end, this suicide is about you. Don't go to extremes to help other people with their suicide. You don't have to document your entire suicide to contribute to scientific knowledge about suicide as to help others do the same. You are living in a selfish world. If this world, and everyone in it, weren't so selfish, this would probably be a good place to live.

So fuck everyone else. If you try to livestream your suicide, someone might report you to the cops to "save you" and they bust your door down and revive you, then you will be stuck here even longer. Just because you were not selfish and tried to help others.

Helping people doesn't work. Everyone is stubborn and stupid, and if you make yourself vulnerable, people will just take advantage of you and give you problems.

Do what you have to do, as simply and efficiently as possible, without adding in variables that can needlessly factor in risk of failure. Unless you just REALLY want other people to witness your suicide, and that's 100% important and necessary for you to feel at peace with doing it, you shouldn't. If you are doing this to be nice and helpful to people in a not-nice and unhelpful world, you shouldn't.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

I'm going to be direct and honest.

This makes no sense within the apocalyptic scenario you're envisioned for your ctb:

1. There is rioting.

2. You offer your mother the option of ctb with SN.

3. She says, "Yes, thank you." She drinks the SN. You watch your own mother die. You make sure she is dead.

4. Rioting is still happening. Maybe it's getting closer.

5. You set up the electronic communication with the witness to your ctb, assuming you can, considering the apocalypse that is in progress.

6. You drink the SN and die.


Have you yet considered what you will do if your mother says no? Will you murder her in order to "save" her? Will you accept her no and go on living in spite of the external circumstances? Will you accept her no and drink the SN anyway? Will she not interfere? If she tries to interfere, will you risk going outside to drink the SN away from her, or will you lock yourself in a room and drink the SN? What if she insists you drink it together? If you drink it together, do you think that you'll be even remotely thinking about livestreaming your ctb?