dreaming_of_pearl

dreaming_of_pearl

I miss you I love you I’m sorry
Jun 10, 2023
54
I'd give about anything.

It's not fair. My body started rejecting it when I got gastreoparasis. There's nothing really fun anymore. My gf ripped her bong on call with me it's not issue I'm not mad at her but I get so sad because i remember I can't ever experience that feeling again I can't ever feel good like that again unless a Miracle happens with my health. I fucking hate my body I hate this little girl I was born from I wish she would die I wish my body would die I hate her I hate her she's so awful no wonder why I'm miserable I HATE being fucking disabled people are telling me to accept this as a new way of life but how can I HOW THE FUCK CAN I ACCEPT THIS "NEW NORMAL"

I akways said I'd rather kms then end up like this and here I am I'm so sick beyond belief I can't do anything anymore I can't go to cons I can't go to raves I can't do any type of drugs I can't go on vacation my quality of life is so poor I should just kms I keep thinking about it I hate everything about myself and I'm so sick of people telling me I have things to look too like shut up when your disabled life becomes shit when your organs stop working life becomes shit the doctors don't even wanna help me
 
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Reactions: doormat25, Spiritual survivor and DyingToDie123
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Hollowman

Empty
Dec 14, 2021
1,243
Sorry for what you're going through, I can somewhat relate. Weed used to be really important to me. It helped me be more functional, it motivated me and allowed me to feel emotions. My social life revolved around it. A couple years ago it just stopped working and left me pretty much a numbed out zombie.
 
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Reactions: Spiritual survivor
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chronicpain123

Member
Nov 7, 2023
27
I relate with you, I smoked weed every single day for 10+ years to help with my pain. And I quit it about a month ago because it was ruining me financially.. but I love it so much and I wish I could just continue but sometimes you just gotta be strong. I guess theres other substances though but idk if that would work 4 u.
 

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