I wonder, if people get their SN, would they act right away?

[Matchaaa]

I got my SN back in August last year, but I've been putting it off because of some personal stuff. I also have a stomach ulcer, and I'm worried that it will cause severe pain after I take it.
I feel kind of torn—am I really a coward for not daring to take it without benzodiazepines? And I'm super unsure if going to a hospital would just waste a ton of money and still not get me any.
Sometimes I just feel like such a failure.

 

[iveseenfootage]

You're not a coward at all, a decision as big as this is entirely up to you and you shouldn't feel pressured to go through/not go through with it by anyone else. It should be on your terms. Personally, I plan to shortly after I receive it, but thats only because I have spent enough time deliberating and preparing.

 

[closetoyou]

ive had sn for several months and i haven't used it yet (obviously ig lol). atp im contemplating throwing it away but idk - it's kind of comforting (in a probably toxic way but whatever)

 

[rigsid]

Personally yes that's what I'm doing. I had everything else prepared so when I got my SN on Wednesday I immediately planned to take it as soon as I could which is Saturday, tomorrow

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

You're not a coward at all, a decision as big as this is entirely up to you and you shouldn't feel pressured to go through/not go through with it by anyone else. It should be on your terms. Personally, I plan to shortly after I receive it, but thats only because I have spent enough time deliberating and preparing.

how did u deliberate and prepare. for how much time?

 

[iveseenfootage]

how did u deliberate anc prepare. for how much time?

I've been suicidal for as long as I can remember, so quite a few years. I've started seriously considering it in the past couple years with concrete plans maybe made around 6 months ago. Unless some massive changes magically happen in my life, it should happen relatively soon. I really just deliberated on how likely it would be for me to be happy with the road my life was headed down, and realized it was close to 0.

 

[DungEater]

Lot of folks on here seem like they are waiting for the right moment, lot of others like having it as a final option as bleak as it is

 

[UserFromNowhere]

I have SN, I have benzodiazepines, don't have meto (could order it) but do have dimenhydrinate. I've had the SN since sometime last year. I can't bring myself to do it though. Impulsively I'll get the urge to die and go stringing up my rope and trying to hang myself, but I can never go through with it, the thought of actually using the SN feels too far. As though my mind recognizes the finality of it all and can't decide if it wants to go or not. Even though I would be perfectly fine if I passed out from a rope and ended up dying.

 

[lysergamide]

Took me 4 years to act on with sn. The answer is no