I will not do it!

[NeverGoodEnuff]

A really good day yesterday but this evening is awful.

My youngest grandson will turn five in a few weeks and I will send him a birthday gift. Haven't seen him in over a year because his father hates me. I don't know what to get him since I don't know what he likes to do His mother, my daughter, rarely calls, once every few months and when I try to call her, she doesn't answer or defers the call. I don't know what I did to be abandoned like this.

The guns are loaded. I am going back and forth, should I? Make this stop! Just make it stop! Just need to get through the night. Tomorrow may be better. I hate this! The ups and downs. This is not how it's supposed to be.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

Just need to get through the night. Tomorrow may be better.

It sounds to me like you don't want to do anything rash. Having loaded weapons nearby is not conducive to resisting the impulse. That must be torture. I hope you make the decision that is right for you. Or made the decision, as it's later now that I'm reading this. Hope you are okay.

 

[raindrops]

A really good day yesterday but this evening is awful.

My youngest grandson will turn five in a few weeks and I will send him a birthday gift. Haven't seen him in over a year because his father hates me. I don't know what to get him since I don't know what he likes to do His mother, my daughter, rarely calls, once every few months and when I try to call her, she doesn't answer or defers the call. I don't know what I did to be abandoned like this.

The guns are loaded. I am going back and forth, should I? Make this stop! Just make it stop! Just need to get through the night. Tomorrow may be better. I hate this! The ups and downs. This is not how it's supposed to be.

Get him some creative bits like paints or playdough or crayons, with some colouring books or you can buy those sets with everything in they have paint, the lot! I use to love those. Some sweets/chocolates. Speaking of guns, Nerf guns are awesome! Although I dont know what age they're for.

Amazon product ASIN B00CI6J5JQOne of these with some colouring books & coloured papers/cards like this! So cool
Amazon product ASIN B07KKN7FNF
I feel your pain my grandmother and me went through a very similar situation. It's still tough now but better because they're older
Sending you hugs

Get him some creative bits like paints or playdough or crayons, with some colouring books or you can buy those sets with everything in they have paint, the lot! I use to love those. Some sweets/chocolates. Speaking of guns, Nerf guns are awesome! Although I dont know what age they're for.

Amazon product ASIN B00CI6J5JQOne of these with some colouring books & coloured papers/cards like this! So cool
Amazon product ASIN B07KKN7FNF
I feel your pain my grandmother and me went through a very similar situation. It's still tough now but better because they're older
Sending you hugs

Plus they gotta clean up the paint ;D

 

[goodbyebunny]

Can't go wrong with lego. It's a creative outlet, and can continue to be enjoyed by people even as they reach the end of childhood.

Hang in there. You're doing so well by hanging on despite these extremely tough and lonely circumstances.

 

[KleinerWolf]

Sorry to hear the relationship isn't good.
I can understand why it bothers you.
I think being a grandparent is an achievement in itself.

Not to derail the thread, just to get it out of the system,
I feel slightly bitter for not knowing if I'll ever even become a parent,
and also kinda sad that I'm not close to my parents.

 

[NeverGoodEnuff]

Thank you all. I'm still here. Better this morning. I called her again and she answered and we did talk for a while. Nothing about the situation, she pretends everything is all good. She blames it all on Covid. Not so because this has been going on for two+ years.

Grandson said he wants an Avatar suction cup bow and arrow. I didn't get to talk to him, she asked him, I could hear him talking in the background. His older brother wasn't home. He was doing a sleepover at his cousin's house.

But I made it through again. This happens at least once a week. I see no chance of improvement in the situation. All I can do is try not to think about it and when I fall, try to remind myself it will pass and time may help. I need to stop caring. Working on that.

Thank you all. This place is such a help.