Venting I was her worst experience

[Falseunderworld]

My very emotionally abusive ex broke off our friendship and im so fucking stupid for not realizing it sooner , i ended things nicely and tried to cope by talking to our mutual friends before i was dropped by them aswell , apparently im horrible and awful....in the apology i expressed i did love her when i was with her ...

I sent a genuine apology to my ex because i thought i was the one who did something wrong and wanted to move on , she then sent me a wall of text saying i never genuinely loved her and that i used her and i was her worst experience and that she hopes ' my future victims' become genuine friends ... she hit me in all the places it hurt then blocked me so i couldn't respond... I could not even say that she has no right to choose how i felt... i have nothing left now and havent been able to stop crying, i feel totally worthless and horrible

I have genuinely never been so suicidal in my life im planning my ctb

 

[lightnings]

I'm sorry to hear your sad story. In this world there are many evil people that have no moral nor regrets about the damage they inflict to the others without remorse.
Coming from similar toxic situations, I can relate to what you say. You are not alone.
Maybe you have been a victim of their narcissistic triangulation and projection.

 

[Worndown]

This is like ripping off a bandaid, it hurts now but you will be better soon.
In this case, not soon but eventually.
Toxic people do things to support their ego. You have experienced a classic case of this.

While it hurts now, think about how lucky you are to be done with her.
You may have loved the thought of her or the person you thought she could be, but you cannot love the person she is.

Been there, done that. Try to feel sorry for her and move on.
Go someplace where there are people. Meet them. Do something positive for you!
I am sorry you had to go through this.

 

[BrainShower]

I was married to a similar person for 13 years and had a child with them before I became the literal devil to them. Ugly, small dick, stupid, psycho, i was every serial killer and repulsive weirdo in her book once she met the guy who she replaced me with.

At some point you will realize that they were the one with the issue. Because why would they get with and stay with you if you were that awful, repulsive, and evil?

They just need you to be the villain in their victim story, otherwise they would have to face their own demons. And they do NOT want to do that.

You actually dodged a bullet, but I know how much it hurts and I am sorry. I can't believe I survived it tbh, I had a loaded shotgun in my mouth more than once.
The pain is totally fucking insane.

 

[Achromatix]

You must feel so lonely it might seem unbearable right now, and understandably so, but focus on your breathing for a bit. Whatever decision you make is ultimately yours, but just make sure you're in sound mind when you make that choice. Loneliness might be the worst pain there is, and when added to self loathing too it can seem like everythings over. But maybe there's another way too? I hope you can find peace