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LifeIsASadist

LifeIsASadist

This world is disgusting
Oct 16, 2024
288
Hey guys. Been a while since I been on and I don't want to sound like a LARPer but I am considering just CTBing by next years Valentines Day which is one month behind my 22nd anniversary of living in this sadistic thing called "Life".

I haven't tested my tourniquet method for a while and I purposely did it so I can hopefully make the survival instinct wear off from last time I tried testing it and it nearly killed me. I live in California (the worst place to live in) and I want to buy a gun as a last resort incase tourniquet fails but the FSC test is going to be a hurdle for a low IQ autist like me since the FSC test weeds out autistic people.

As of now, my mind is realizing what do I even have to see in the future other than misery and loneliness that society likes to blame me for? What purpose do I have to be alive other than risking debt soon because my bank account has been going down lately and I am horrible at saving money because I try my hardest to cope with literally anything. My tourniquet as of now is my ticket out of this planet.
 
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