i want to die because of the people who love me

[Tiktok]

i see people saying they don't want to kill themselves because they don't want to hurt the people who love them.
i do have one person who loves me, and that's my mom.
what i'm going to say might sound cruel, selfish, or whatever.
i really hope my suicide will upset my mom. i want it to tear her life apart and for her to fall into deep depression like i am .
i don't need to say the obvious; that i don't like my mom. but she loves me.
i just hate her for bringing me to this existence and never taking my pain seriously.
when i tell her i'm depressed she just says "everyone is sad sometimes" or when i told her i want to kill myself she's like "don't be weak, i hate weak people who can't survive. life is a jungle and you need to keep your head up and survive!"
all of the things she said to me makes me want to change her whole life apart.

 

[smile418]

I feel the exact same way.

 

[Mr2005]

It's your life and whatever anyone else thinks you're never going to know anyway. I understand the feeling, I'm angry too but she isn't worth my life. I'm too damn nice to the woman tbh. Let her believe what she wants because that's how people get by. I don't see her much because it's just too tempting to tell her how I feel. Then I question if I really have any right to feel like that anyway. Emotions aren't always rational and taking responsibility is the hardest thing

 

[KLUF]

Your mother's love is an evolutionary mechanism that makes her care about you in order to ensure her genes pass on. It's just selfishness that drives her, nothing more.
"you need to keep your head up and survive!" sounds kinda cruel. You didn't ask but she brought you here and tells you to survive.

Try to ask her why should you survive, then keep asking "why" or similar questions until she can't answer, she'd possibly yell at you at that point and the conversation would end.

 

[The Dark Chaos]

I have a lot of arguments with myy mom. Like, everyy single dayy! One dayy, my mom was, as usual, yelling at me I snapped that I'm gonnaa kill myself and thenn she'll have no problems. You knoww what she said?!? She told me to go on, kill myself and that she wouldn't care. She didn't mean it. Or maybe she did. I don't know. I hope she meant what she said. I don't wish the same for my mom. Or anyone else. I don't want to tear apart anyone because of my decision. But sometimes, I wishh it does.

 

[IWTD]

i see people saying they don't want to kill themselves because they don't want to hurt the people who love them.
i do have one person who loves me, and that's my mom.
what i'm going to say might sound cruel, selfish, or whatever.
i really hope my suicide will upset my mom. i want it to tear her life apart and for her to fall into deep depression like i am .
i don't need to say the obvious; that i don't like my mom. but she loves me.
i just hate her for bringing me to this existence and never taking my pain seriously.
when i tell her i'm depressed she just says "everyone is sad sometimes" or when i told her i want to kill myself she's like "don't be weak, i hate weak people who can't survive. life is a jungle and you need to keep your head up and survive!"
all of the things she said to me makes me want to change her whole life apart.

People without the "disease" don't understand. I've heard and listened to people discussing it. The people I've listened to have not a clue. I try and Not hold it against them. I've reached out and grasp only air. I have one person I'm personally hanging on to life by a thread.