iamalreadydead

iamalreadydead

Student
Nov 25, 2022
138
I compulsively message and call people I think are close to me and for the most part it's reciprocated because these people really think I'm their friend, but really I don't want to be involved with any of them. I don't want anyone. But i know i could never force myself to stop messaging and talking to people, because being alone makes me upset and suicidal. I can't live healthily without people but I really wish I could
 
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Daxter_87

Daxter_87

If my name is crossed out, hopefully I'm dead.
May 28, 2023
400
Hi there. It really is a complex subject, it's the hedgehog's dilemma. Having no one around can feel lonely to many people, but surrounding yourself with others ends up in more suffering. The solution? I honestly don't know. I personally cut off all communication with all my friends a few years ago. Now I don't interact with anyone besides my immediate family.
 
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iamalreadydead

iamalreadydead

Student
Nov 25, 2022
138
Hi there. It really is a complex subject, it's the hedgehog's dilemma. Having no one around can feel lonely to many people, but surrounding yourself with others ends up in more suffering. The solution? I honestly don't know. I personally cut off all communication with all my friends a few years ago. Now I don't interact with anyone besides my immediate family.
did you eventually get used to the isolation?
 
Daxter_87

Daxter_87

If my name is crossed out, hopefully I'm dead.
May 28, 2023
400
did you eventually get used to the isolation?

Well, other than having sex (which I never had to begin with), I would say that mostly yes. But I still communicate with other people online (like I'm doing right now); it's kind of tricky. There are some people who are totally fine alone and do not ever need to interact with anyone. I don't want to sound intrusive, but FuneralCry on this forum is a perfect example; if you look at her profile, you will see that she has even disabled the PM option. And I think I know why, she just happens to be very wise, she knows the inherent suffering that comes with any interaction.

To sum it up, I think that most of us (myself included) are not wise enough to see through it. One can isolate oneself, but for most there will probably remain some yearning for companionship. Hopefully that won't be your case, I hope you can manage the situation.
 
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