pipelinepumpkin
the walk home is quiet
- Feb 13, 2022
- 3
I tried. I ditched out of school, I took the bus to the shopping centre, I went and bought cable cutters, I sat on top of that roof for over an hour trying to get through the safety netting, and I just couldn't do it, I couldn't get through. I wanted to, I still want to, I want to so badly, I'm so tired. Everyone keeps talking to me about jobs and flats and lives and the future, I don't want the future! I didn't even want to reach my 16th birthday and then I did, I didn't want to be 18 either, I just wanna go. I'm so tried, and it's gonna be like this for the rest of my life, its never gonna stop. I can't even think about my girlfriend, she keeps talking about how she never wants to leave me, and how she cant wait till we're older and can be together, and how we're gonna work when she moves for uni, and i dont want that! i dont want the future, i dont fucking want it, and the only reason im still here at all is because i cant use cable cutters properly! i just want it to stop, i just want it to stop. People are acting like i had a change of heart because im still here, like i suddenly found a reason to keep going, but the only reason i came down is because it became apparent that jumping off wasn't a viable option. im just so tired