Method I tried to CTB via caffeine OD - AMA

[Unsure_about_living]

About 5 months ago I tried to CTB via caffeine OD. I took about (probably slightly less than) 50g of caffeine powder, which I dissolved in boiling water and then drank once cool enough. The whole experience was horrendous and I would not recommend it as a method (in addition to the fact that it obviously did not work). Happy to answer any questions people have.

 

[Throwmyselfaway]

Why did you decide to go with caffeine? Just curious on that.

 

[Arthaniel]

About 5 months ago I tried to CTB via caffeine OD. I took about (probably slightly less than) 50g of caffeine powder, which I dissolved in boiling water and then drank once cool enough. The whole experience was horrendous and I would not recommend it as a method (in addition to the fact that it obviously did not work). Happy to answer any questions people have.

Can you describe the effect of such an amount of caffeine from the moment of taking it?

 

[Nymph]

Why did it fail?:(

 

[Life is pointless]

About 5 months ago I tried to CTB via caffeine OD. I took about (probably slightly less than) 50g of caffeine powder, which I dissolved in boiling water and then drank once cool enough. The whole experience was horrendous and I would not recommend it as a method (in addition to the fact that it obviously did not work). Happy to answer any questions people have.

Did u managed to ingest all the 50 g?

 

[not_close]

Did you throw up? Did you take any antiemetics to prevent throwing up? Was it painful? What symptoms of caffeine OD did you experience?

 

[needaplan]

maybe not the most reliable source here if no further info is given :(

 

[Unsure_about_living]

Why did you decide to go with caffeine? Just curious on that.

It was easily available, and though I had considered non-drug methods (e.g. hanging) I found it physically difficult to force myself to go through with them.

I bought SN several times but then chickened out and disposed of it...and now it's not really available in the UK

Can you describe the effect of such an amount of caffeine from the moment of taking it?

I can't really to be honest as my memory is really bad (for the few hours before taking it as well). I know I had a really strong burning smell, and that it was physically a almost impossible sensation to withstand (hence I called a friend for help). I assume the most horrible part was heart palpitations / feeling like I was having a heart attacked, bit as I said my memory is very minimal.

I also couldn't really walk. As in, I had to crawl to the front door (and even that was like climbing a mountain) and my friend dragged me into the taxi. She also said that time appeared to be going very slowly for me, like I kept asking why no one (taxi or ambulance) had arrived yet.

Can you describe the effect of such an amount of caffeine from the moment of taking it?

I can't really to be honest as my memory is really bad (for the few hours before taking it as well). I know I had a really strong burning smell, and that it was physically a almost impossible sensation to withstand (hence I called a friend for help). I assume the most horrible part was heart palpitations / feeling like I was having a heart attacked, bit as I said my memory is very minimal.

I also couldn't really walk. As in, I had to crawl to the front door (and even that was like climbing a mountain) and my friend dragged me into the taxi. She also said that time appeared to be going very slowly for me, like I kept asking why no one (taxi or ambulance) had arrived yet.

Did u managed to ingest all the 50 g?

I dissolved in water and drank it. I would say I ingested slightly under 50g as the very end of the drink wasn't totally dissolved. But it was roughly 50g

Did u managed to ingest all the 50 g?

I dissolved in water and drank it. I would say I ingested slightly under 50g as the very end of the drink wasn't totally dissolved. But it was roughly 50g

Did you throw up? Did you take any antiemetics to prevent throwing up? Was it painful? What symptoms of caffeine OD did you experience?

I threw up. A lot (like extreme vomitting for the next 24 hours. To the point that I tore my esophagus. Would not recommend in any way). I didn't take antiemetics as I didn't have access but also thought with the dose of be likely to CTB anyway. It wasn't painful per se (though as explained above my memory is bad, I think due to both the overdose and the trauma of the experience), just a horrible feeling. Also explained the symptoms (as far as I can remember - there was likely much more that I have thankfully repressed!) Above

 

[MAIO]

It was easily available, and though I had considered non-drug methods (e.g. hanging) I found it physically difficult to force myself to go through with them.

I bought SN several times but then chickened out and disposed of it...and now it's not really available in the UK

I can't really to be honest as my memory is really bad (for the few hours before taking it as well). I know I had a really strong burning smell, and that it was physically a almost impossible sensation to withstand (hence I called a friend for help). I assume the most horrible part was heart palpitations / feeling like I was having a heart attacked, bit as I said my memory is very minimal.

I also couldn't really walk. As in, I had to crawl to the front door (and even that was like climbing a mountain) and my friend dragged me into the taxi. She also said that time appeared to be going very slowly for me, like I kept asking why no one (taxi or ambulance) had arrived yet.

I can't really to be honest as my memory is really bad (for the few hours before taking it as well). I know I had a really strong burning smell, and that it was physically a almost impossible sensation to withstand (hence I called a friend for help). I assume the most horrible part was heart palpitations / feeling like I was having a heart attacked, bit as I said my memory is very minimal.

I also couldn't really walk. As in, I had to crawl to the front door (and even that was like climbing a mountain) and my friend dragged me into the taxi. She also said that time appeared to be going very slowly for me, like I kept asking why no one (taxi or ambulance) had arrived yet.

I dissolved in water and drank it. I would say I ingested slightly under 50g as the very end of the drink wasn't totally dissolved. But it was roughly 50g

I dissolved in water and drank it. I would say I ingested slightly under 50g as the very end of the drink wasn't totally dissolved. But it was roughly 50g

I threw up. A lot (like extreme vomitting for the next 24 hours. To the point that I tore my esophagus. Would not recommend in any way). I didn't take antiemetics as I didn't have access but also thought with the dose of be likely to CTB anyway. It wasn't painful per se (though as explained above my memory is bad, I think due to both the overdose and the trauma of the experience), just a horrible feeling. Also explained the symptoms (as far as I can remember - there was likely much more that I have thankfully repressed!) Above

are you sure it was 50g? I have read toxicity effects of far less killing people very quickly even for those who were not suicidal. I wonder if boiling the caffeine screws up the potency/makes it far weaker and am very curious how long it was boiled for/if the caffeine in the bottom was actually the majority of the dosage. This stuff gets complicated fast.

 

[hellodarkness]

Did you couple it with an anti-nauseant and high dose ephedrine? That triad always made the most sense to me to trigger cardiac arrest

 

[FluffyDove]

Did you call for help by choice? Or did your friend find you?

 

[Unsure_about_living]

are you sure it was 50g? I have read toxicity effects of far less killing people very quickly even for those who were not suicidal. I wonder if boiling the caffeine screws up the potency/makes it far weaker and am very curious how long it was boiled for/if the caffeine in the bottom was actually the majority of the dosage. This stuff gets complicated fast.

Yep, measured with a decimal scale. May have ingested slightly less due to the powder not dissolving (hence not easy to drink the end of it), but roughly 50g. I don't think I would have boiled the caffeine (I boiled the water and then just poured over), and as I said, there was a small portion possibly left at the bottom un-dissolved, but I firmly believe this was a small proportion of the 50g. But not claiming to be a chemist!

Did you call for help by choice? Or did your friend find you?

I called for help by choice, though I do not really remember doing this. I was so, so certain in my mind that I would be able to withstand whatever effects the drugs had and not alert anyone, but it seems I did call. The only memory I have is not being able to bear the physical sensation and therefore calling for help, rather than a sudden desire to live.
(and sorry for the slow replies, was staying away from this site in an attempt at remaining mentally well...)