Venting i think the only way i could go on is if i could permanently reside within a psychiatric hospital, but i don't think that's possible

[grendel4578]

got bpd, avpd, c-ptsd, adhd, and severe depression like i posted abt before and i think i may be developing some sort of dependency disorder, which sucks considering my family is abusive. i cannot do anything really and i have thoughts of shooting myself and wishing i had a gun or even having thoughts of attacking my family practically every day, and since i dont have the motivation for anything i cant earn money to get a decent method. i just want to permanently reside within a psychiatric hospital or somewhere where everything is regimented, but i don't think i could stay permanently. i just dont wanna do much of anything anymore nor be with my family. i really don't, i can't take it. though honestly even being there would probably be shit because some foods make me retch and vomit even from smelling or seeing them (including any sort of pizza or cheese, and those are probably there unfortunately), and being sedated or forcefully injected with neuroleptics in the ass isn't a very nice thing, and it likely isnt exactly free to be there. i hate everything

 

[hans0solo]

wherever you live, if you can reach out to some social service agencies, you might be able to apply for a disability scheme and then get housing away from your family?

 

[grendel4578]

wherever you live, if you can reach out to some social service agencies, you might be able to apply for a disability scheme and then get housing away from your family?

i'm not sure, i live in washington state, USA

 

[loyalskateboard]

Could you look into supported living options? It doesn't have to be a hospital or home. They have staff 24/7 and help you with daily living tasks. They can bring you to appointments and find you volunteer work if that's what you choose to do. Any medications will be given to you and the support is similar to a low-risk psych ward but in a home environment. If you can call a social service agency they can help you. I don't live in the USA so I can't give you any exact numbers/agencies but it's worth looking into.

 

[grendel4578]

Could you look into supported living options? It doesn't have to be a hospital or home. They have staff 24/7 and help you with daily living tasks. They can bring you to appointments and find you volunteer work if that's what you choose to do. Any medications will be given to you and the support is similar to a low-risk psych ward but in a home environment. If you can call a social service agency they can help you. I don't live in the USA so I can't give you any exact numbers/agencies but it's worth looking into.

I can try, I'll do research into it. I was not aware of this type of thing even existing.