Venting I think I'm ready to leave now.

[Blacksheep93]

Hi everyone. So I have been contemplating suicide for a long time. School grades have been going down, I've been skipping classes, because I'm slowly losing my motivation to go on. The only reason I didn't do it, is because I had a friend who was there for me and talked to me when things were difficult. I've vaguely told him that I'm planning to run away to a different country to ctb, but he hasn't figured it out exactly.

He said he won't talk to me anymore until I go to a psychologist. I tried to explain to him why that won't do anything (I've been to countless psychologists and hospitals, my mental state just keeps getting worse), but he kept insisting.
My parents are mad at me because I've barely eaten anything the last couple of weeks and because of my school problems. They say it's my fault I can't keep any friends, that I make them look stupid and I'm selfish.

Clearly nobody wants me around, and my mental health has gotten worse over the years. My school is also on lockdown for weeks because of this stupid virus, so I'm stuck at home. I really really want to ctb, but SN for me is really hard to acquire and it would take too long anyway. I'm trying to find a method that doesn't bring anyone else in danger, or traumatise them.

I'm very much stuck and it's like I'm frozen in time. With no one to talk to, or at least no one who doesn't want to change my mind, I thought of coming back on here because people actually understand. Life has become unbearable.

 

[itsmeagain]

Darling I'm so sorry that nobody has responded to you, I'm sure that people are just going through some hard times too. I am so sorry all this shit has been happening to you, and I'm even sorrier that your parents have been so cruel!

Any parent who does that kind of stuff or says ANY of that is absive. I don't know if you're one of the people that thinks that their parents aren't abusive and that you have to be hit to be abused, but that's absolutely NOT TRUE DARLING. I'm so sorry you're suffering right now, but we are really glad to have you on the site. If you want to PM me, you're more than welcome of COURSE.

It's very good how you still want people to change your mind. It's important that you know what you want and maybe not place for CTB just yet if you're still in the debating stage, unless bipolar or some other kind of thing is in effect, which it is for me :(

My parents abused me and continue to do so. Luckily i'm away from them now, but i still want to go anyways. You're very thoughtful for wanting to make sure that you don't cause anyone else trauma, because it's a very hard thing to tell people they can't get hit by a train when they so desperately want to leave!

It sounds like you're in college by the way you mention skipping classes, but maybe you're in high-school too. If you need help, I'm a college student myself right now, and i've gone through high school and back and I write mean papers. If you need any help, please send me a PM, to talk,for a tutor, anything you could need, okay baby?

Just hit my username and his Start Chat (not conversation!) And i'll be more than happy to help

Or just drop me a hug and wait for othe rpeople to keep on typing in here, honey!

 

[kokporn]

where are you from?

 

[Blacksheep93]

where are you from?

I'm from Belgium, you?

Darling I'm so sorry that nobody has responded to you, I'm sure that people are just going through some hard times too. I am so sorry all this shit has been happening to you, and I'm even sorrier that your parents have been so cruel!

Any parent who does that kind of stuff or says ANY of that is absive. I don't know if you're one of the people that thinks that their parents aren't abusive and that you have to be hit to be abused, but that's absolutely NOT TRUE DARLING. I'm so sorry you're suffering right now, but we are really glad to have you on the site. If you want to PM me, you're more than welcome of COURSE.

It's very good how you still want people to change your mind. It's important that you know what you want and maybe not place for CTB just yet if you're still in the debating stage, unless bipolar or some other kind of thing is in effect, which it is for me :(

My parents abused me and continue to do so. Luckily i'm away from them now, but i still want to go anyways. You're very thoughtful for wanting to make sure that you don't cause anyone else trauma, because it's a very hard thing to tell people they can't get hit by a train when they so desperately want to leave!

It sounds like you're in college by the way you mention skipping classes, but maybe you're in high-school too. If you need help, I'm a college student myself right now, and i've gone through high school and back and I write mean papers. If you need any help, please send me a PM, to talk,for a tutor, anything you could need, okay baby?

Just hit my username and his Start Chat (not conversation!) And i'll be more than happy to help

Or just drop me a hug and wait for othe rpeople to keep on typing in here, honey!

I don't think I have enough posts yet to PM you, but I will as soon as I do.

Thank you.

 

[itsmeagain]

I'm from Belgium, you?

I don't think I have enough posts yet to PM you, but I will as soon as I do.

Thank you.

Aww well that's okay, Just keep me in mind :D i'll be around here.